Sunday, December 28, 2008

my every year end of the year recap survey

what did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
-- Had a boy as a roommate. Gave two weeks notice with absolutely no regret or feeling of guilt. Hosted a Mary Kay party.

did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
-- I didn't make any. I will for this year but I will write a post about that later.

anyone close to you give birth?
-- My cousin had a baby! I know of three births that will happen in 2009 so far too.

did anyone close to you die?
-- Nope.

what countries did you visit?
-- None.

what would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
-- More days that I care about what I look like than not.

what date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
-- No really specific dates. Just some events here and there that were either fun or thought-provoking.

what was your biggest achievement of the year?
-- Realizing that I have found irrational and inconvienent love and that it will only grow from here on out.

what was your biggest failure?
-- My efforts at taking care of my health and fitness. The better way to put it is my complete lack of effort at doing so.

did you suffer illness or injury?
-- I have realized that about the middle of November to the middle of January mean one giant sinus headache at the very least. I am allergic to something in San Antonio air that knocks me down hard and then keeps kicking me in the shin for six weeks after the initial blow. It's awesome. If by awesome you mean suck-tastic.

what was the best thing you bought?
-- I like my new apartment. I got a new bed as a gift and that has been pretty lovely.

whose behavior merited celebration?
-- My sister is pregnant! My cousin had a baby! Kate moved back to San Antonio!

whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
-- Whoever it was at work that decided to push me out of my job. I don't know who or why and quite honestly neither fact would make me feel better. I am just glad I have one more real shift to work there and then I'm done.

where did most of your money go?
-- Rent, bills, the usual boring things that suck it all up.

what did you get really, really, really excited about?
-- Registering for classes.

what song will always remind you of 2008?
-- Big Blue Sea by Bob Schnieder. That's me and K's song, officially.

compared to this time last year, are you
i. happier or sadder? -- happier
ii. thinner or fatter? -- about the same i guess
iii. richer or poorer? -- about the same

what do you wish you'd done more of?
-- Taken time to just sit and breathe.

what do you wish you'd done less of?
--Procrastination

how will you be spending Christmas?
-- Christmas Eve, Kiris and I went to my parent's house and spent the evening with them and my sister and her family. Christmas Day we went to K's mom's house. Both times were definitely good times.

did you fall in love in 2008?
-- Just more in love with K.

how many one-night stands?
-- None. Not my style, plus I'm very happily attached.

what was your favorite TV program?
-- Life. The Office. Grey's Anatomy. CSI: Miami on A&E and Criminal Minds on A&E.

do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
-- Nope

what was the best book you read?
-- Eat Pray Love

what was your greatest musical discovery?
-- Bob Schneider

what did you want and get?
-- A swift kick in the ass to get me back into school in a full-time capacity.

what was your favorite film of this year?
-- The Dark Knight

what did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
-- I slept in... K took me out for Japanese food at my favorite restaurant. I met a bunch of friends at a bar. I turned 28 and it was a good time.

what one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
--More confidence in my decisions.

how would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
-- Ugh. None.

what kept you sane?
-- Getting to come home to a loving boyfriend. Allergy medicine.

which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
-- I have a crush on the character of Charlie Crews from Life.

what political issue stirred you the most?
-- The presidential election and the subsequent cabinet choices. I am seriously stoked for the U.S.! Maybe we'll have respect from the world again...

who did you miss?
-- I don't know. I kind of missed myself. Towards the end of the year especially, I've kind of felt like a shell of myself.

who was the best new person you met?
-- Heather. And I don't remember exactly when I met Kristen but we definitely firmed up our relationship this year.

tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008:
-- Everything happens for a reason, even if it takes you a year to realize how the events lined up just right for something cool to happen.

quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
-- And its days like this that burn me
Turn me inside out and learn me
Not to tell you anything I think I know
Well I think I'll tell you all that I know
I don't want to be alone I want to be a stone
I wanna sink to the bottom of the ocean
And lie there laugh there with you laugh
Yhere with you til I'm gone

At the bottom of the big blue sea
Just you and me At the bottom of the big blue sea

Saturday, December 13, 2008

strange things are afoot at the circle k

Not really. But I am on the cusp of some very huge changes and I have to say that the more I talk about them, the more excited I feel. I have to get through this month with my sanity intact and then I will spill all of the gory details. Or close to all of them.

But I can say this in the meantime. One of the most exciting parts of my huge undertaking starts tomorrow morning. I'm going to one of the five thousand colleges in San Antonio and sitting down with a counselor and hashing some details out. I am returning to school full-time in January. I will be finishing my Bachelor's in Psychology and probably adding a minor in something along the lines of government or history to help with the residency requirements (you have to take so many units at a school to earn a diploma there). I will also get a teaching certification and hopefully teach while pursuing a Masters in probably something along the lines of Psychology or Counseling. I am VERY excited about this. It is going to be crazy hard and take some serious time and effort but I truly believe it will all be worth it.

It is so lovely to look at a potentially awful situation and see an amazing opportunity and pounce on it before you have time to sink.

Also, I got my first weight loss star this week! I have lost a total of 6.4 pounds. Lots more to go, but not that many more until my jeans will fit better and not much more than that for others to be able to see that I'm becoming fit and fabulous.

Maybe December doesn't have to be a month of suck in my life after all!

Saturday, December 6, 2008

...

Sick of being sick, that's me. I still don't feel good. I have more of my voice back which is good. Last night K and I went out to dinner and I think that's what wiped me out for most of today. How pathetic is that?! Making it more ridiculous is we had Japanese food so I fully took advantage of the hot green tea offering and had a giant bowl of udon which hit the spot. I can't believe how long it's been since I had a good bowl of udon...

K and I were supposed to go to a friend's fish fry tonight. I actually really wanted to go. I spent most of the day in bed and then took a shower and realized there was no way it was going to work. So K is over there and I'm at home grumpily watching tv. It's totally fine and probably good that he is over there because I am definitely a huge grump.

I think I'm going to just tuck myself into bed and watch some SNL.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

december

So this is what I was thinking about because I was laying in bed feeling miserable and couldn't think of anything happy to think about. I hate December.

It truly used to be my favorite month and I worked in a mall for a lot of years so that should really qualify that statement. Even in California people just get a little nicer to strangers. They hold doors open, there's more smiles, there's twinkle lights EVERYWHERE, and Christmas music is simply fantastic. Then there is plenty of family time and good food and surprises seemingly around every corner.

But let's take a look at my last few Decembers.

2008
One week a sinus and ear infection. One week off. Another week of the allergies from hell. A shot in the doctor's office, two pills in the morning, one nasal spray once in the morning, another nasal spray two other times during the day, and another set of pills that is a little confusing but is helping clear the fluid in my ears so I'm alright with it. I sound like a frog lives in my throat, I am coughing from my toes, and sneezing like a mofo.

2007
Two weeks of misery that was also allergy induced. I just didn't know any better and waited a few days before going to the doctor. It was right before Christmas and I barely had the energy to do anything at all Christmas-y. And I was broke from not working.

2006
It wasn't entirely bad, just weird. I went to California with my mom at the beginning because my grandmother was having surgery and no one knew how well she was going to do with the operation and the recovery. My mom ended up not coming back home for several months. Christmas was a little stranger than normal because everyone was in California for my cousin's wedding except me. I did make sugar cookies with K and he had never rolled out dough and done sprinkles before and that was kind of awesome.

2005
My dad and I drove all of my earthly belongings from Riverside to San Antonio. It took exactly the same amount of time to get from Riverside to the border of Texas as it did to get from the border of Texas to San Antonio. It's a big freaking state. It was a very tumultuous time for me, deciding to move and figuring out a way to make it happen. Or really convince my parents to help me make it happen because they financed the whole operation and let me move in with them with no restrictions. I made the decision quickly and said a lot of sad good-byes and moved with no idea how it would turn out. Being a full-time auntie and having a fantastic boyfriend have worked out pretty well though.

I guess that's about it. I am just grumpy and frustrated because I am so incredibly tired but I cannot get comfortable enough to actually fall asleep. There's too much air blowing on my face but turning the fan down means my legs start sweating again. I need to lie down to sleep but then I can feel my pulse in my sinuses. So I'm blogging and watching old sitcoms. TV Land and Nick at Nite are fantastic in my book.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

allergies

I recently read that more people die in Southern California annually because of air pollution related causes than car crashes. If you've ever driven on any Southern California freeway, you know what a remarkable statement this is. I never had any problems. I started drinking bottled or filtered water, or at least putting lemon in water after I moved to Riverside because the water tasted funky, but that was really the only environmentally charged change I made.

Now, however, I live in San Antonio. On the daily weather forecasts, they also include mold, pollen, and mountain cedar air counts. I don't know exactly what they mean except that a lot of people in San Antonio have allergies. I personally have allergies like a mofo. No really, I think I saw my doctor right that in my chart today. Day one, I have itchy eyes, the sniffles, and maybe a minor sore throat or headache. Most everything goes away with some Tylenol or something similar. From what I've seen, this is what most people in San Antonio mean when they say they have allergies. That is the set of symptoms they have during a particular season. Not me, my friends.

Day two, my ears are so full of random crap that it feels like I'm in a swimming pool. And everything is very very loud to me even though I know it's all really just normal volume. I have snot just dripping wantonly out of my nose and my throat is on fire. I have a cough that disturbs young children. Any energy I have is simply sucked right out of me when I do something like take a shower or walk from the bed to the kitchen to get some juice. My sinuses are so full that the pressure starts to make me believe that if I can just poke something through my cheeks it will go away. My sneezes sound and feel as if they originated in my toes. My nose is red and raw. And anyone who sees me, including medical professionals, give me looks of sympathy before I even open my mouth to say anything at all.

Last year I waited a few days to go to the doctor and ended up with two shots in my bum, a bag of prescription samples, and a handful of slips to turn in to a pharmacy. So this year when I felt all cruddy two weeks ago, I went to the doctor. It turned out I had a sinus infection and two ear infections. Good thing I only have two ears! I took three doses of antibiotics a day for ten days. I felt better on day seven and finished the pills because YOU ALWAYS FINISH ANTIBIOTICS. Then my throat got sore again. That was on Sunday. Monday, I had an obnoxiously runny nose at work and the beginning of a cough. I took every decongestant and antihistamine I could get my hands on and didn't really get any relief.

A quasi side note to my story is that one benefit of working with nurses is they often have awesome suggestions on tricks for feeling better or at least getting through your day. Last night, a nurse told me to squirt saline solution up each nostril and let it run out. My dear friend Kate, aka Splenda, uses a netti (neti?) pot every day so this wasn't a completely foreign idea, but I have never done anything like that before. Let me tell you, I could actually breathe again! The nurse's suggestion was to do it once an hour and she stocked me up on supplies. Oh, needless syringes, how I love thee...

Last night when I got home I was going to take a very hot shower and go to bed. There was no hot water so I just went to bed. I slept for a few hours and then woke up even snottier and also a little disorientated. My nose was killing me and I realized there was just no way to go into work and not get fired for yelling at someone or something like that. I claimed the futon and propped up pillows and slept a little bit. This morning I called and asked for any appointment today.

It's allergies. They just knock me down. I got a shot in my hip, which is really a shot in your butt so I don't know exactly why they say that. I got a bag that has about 10 days worth of allergy medicine samples and yet another handful of prescription slips to take into a pharmacy probably next pay day. I was also told that if I don't show signs of improvement very soon, I will need to see an allergist.

I already had a handful of pills to take every morning and now I've got two more to add to the mix. And two nose sprays. Most of the pills can probably be eliminated by losing weight and exercising, which I am doing, but the allergy stuff will probably have a home in my medicine cabinet as long as I live in San Antonio. Today I am considering making a list of other places to move to because holy crap I am miserable.

Say you feel really sorry for me and you live in the area. Feel free to express your empathy with orange juice (well, really any kind of juice), the kind of tissue with lotion in it, cough drops, or a few bottles of water. I'm staying home tomorrow and then will play the rest of the week by ear.

I'm going to take a shower now because I heard a rumor that the hot water is back on. I heart steam.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

thanksgiving

Oh, Thanksgiving was fabulous. K had to work which wasn't super great but he had a long shift while earning time and a half and that will be a nice boost to his next paycheck. I went to my parent's house and then fixed him a plate and took it to Starbucks where I met his mom and one of his sisters. We sat and chatted for an hour or so which was great. I ended up just going home from there because my eyes were getting really itchy. It turned out one of my contacts had a good sized chunk missing out of it so that's probably what was causing all the discomfort. Easy fix!

The day after Thanksgiving K and I went to his sister's house and ate up some delicious leftovers and enjoyed conversation and whatnot. I need to confess that I absolutely LOVE stuffing. Love it. Could eat an entire plate of it and nothing else for dinner and be a happy girl. K's mom makes stuffing like no other that I have tasted and I have to say it is pretty delicious. It's got a kick to it. But even fawning over it, I need to point out that my mom makes really fantastic stuffing too. Hers has more vegetables in it and I really like that too. I think that's probably the best thing about feeling like I'm part of two families now. Two different sets of holiday traditions with some things that are similar and other things that are very different. Good times for Melissa!

I got to play with my niece and nephew and I haven't gotten to do that in awhile. My niece is going to be five in January and she is seriously so much fun to play with right now. I've loved her for different reasons her entire life and probably will continue to find new ones to love her for, but right now there's a lot more give and take in conversation and playing and she's just a great little person. I think we have a very strong bond and it delights me to no end. My nephew is also adorable in completely different ways. He is a lot quieter than my niece and not quite as bossy but definitely still his own person. I have a hard time picturing anyone else being able to top my dad as his favorite person in the entire world.

There's going to be a whole new baby Z in June! I'm so excited about that too. I finally have that baby fascination switch flipped to on where I delight in little baby clothes and holding babies (that I know) even when they're screaming their heads off. I think my niece and nephew kind of taught me that it's not so scary. And I just got a little older. My biological clock is just fine, but I am thrilled to hold a newborn again in the crook of my arm and be fascinated by itty bitty baby toes and fingers.

I've been thinking about a lot of other stuff that I will try to write about soon. But for now, honestly, it's nice and quiet and a nap just seems like an excellent idea.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

grown up survey

What bill do you hate paying the most?
ugh, rent.


Where was the last place you had a romantic dinner?
carraba's. kind of awhile ago. that's okay though. i'd rather have money to get all the bills paid on time than go out to nice places all the time.


Do you regret losing your virginity to who you lost it to?
that's a complicated thing to talk about.


What do you really want to be doing right now?
this being home early and playing on myspace is kind of nice actually

What did you want to be when you grew up?
first thing i ever really seriously claimed was criminologist and that was way before all the csi shows and whatnot

Why did you choose the shirt that you have on right now?
this scrub top is part of what i'm supposed to wear to work every day

What are your thoughts on gas prices?
i'm pretty stoked that today i saw it was $1.69 at one place.
hallelujah for a break on my wallet!

First thought when the alarm went off this morning?
actually, i woke up before my alarm went off because i sneezed half the volume of liquid in my head out.
there was no going back to sleep after that so i just turned it off and got ready for work

Last thought before going to sleep last night?
i really love kiris. seriously, that's what i thought because he was already asleep and snoring away and freaking adorable.


Do you miss being a child?
not really. i felt like i was an awkward kid forever.
i would like to go back a few years or at least feel like i have better direction right now

What errand/chore do you despise?
doing the dishes

If you didn't have to work, would you volunteer?
probably not.
too many years of "time worked is time paid" drilled into my head

Get up early or sleep in?
sleep in fo sho

Have you found real love yet?
yes i have :)

Favorite lunch meat?
i kind of rotate through different ones.
roast beef, turkey, ham, pastrami

What do you get every time you go into Wal-Mart?
usually a small collection of random stuff that i am dire need of because i don't really like walmart and usually only go when everything else is closed

Beach or lake?
either one.
sometimes i really miss newport beach

Do you think marriage is an outdated ritual?
nope.
i think it's a ritual i would like to take part in sooner rather than later

Do you own property?
no.


What's your drink?
vodka tonic with lime

Cops or Robbers?
what does that mean?

Who from high school would you like to run into?
no one that i don't already keep in touch with. i would like to spend some face time with the ones i talk to here and there online though.


Sopranos or Desperate Housewives?
grey's anatomy

Worst relationship mistake that you wish you could take back?
oh, i don't know.
every mistake helped me learn a lesson though so not such a waste really

Do you like the person that sits directly across from you at work?
the person who sits directly across from me at work changes daily. sometimes several times a shift. i sit across from patients.


What famous person would you like to have dinner with?
for reals i love hillary clinton and barack obama and have for years. i think they are fascinating people. heather armstrong of dooce. com would be a guaranteed fun evening but i am nowhere cool enough to pull that one off.


Indoors or Outdoors?
there are a lot of factors that go into that decision

Have you ever crashed your own personal vehicle?
yes

Have you ever had to use a fire extinguisher for its intended purposes?
nope

Last book you read?
enchantment by orson scott card and it was seriously fantastic

Do you have a teddy bear?
no but i have a blanket.


Somewhere in California you've never been and would like to go?
okay, i've been to sacramento but i've never been inside the state capitol building. i would like to explore it the way i have the texas one. also, i would like to go to regan's library. omg, i am such a nerd.


Do you go to church?
sometimes

At this point in your life would you rather start a new career or a new relationship?
career


How old are you?
28

Thursday, November 6, 2008

ww update #1-the start of week 2

I started Weight Watchers with my mom last week. We decided to go to meetings together. Actually, I asked her if she'd do it with me because I can always lose the first ten pounds and then I get stuck or something happens and I ultimately give up. She has been very succesful with Weight Watchers in the past and always knows all kinds of good snacks or meals or which ones are the best frozen dinners.

So last week I started off all gung-ho and then completely fizzled out towards the end. K and I ordered pizza over the weekend and that's pretty costly in points. And I just didn't pay as close attention as I should have. Weight Watchers has healthy guidelines to follow and I didn't get enough dairy most of the days during the week. I took the stairs more often, but other than that didn't really amp up any kind of exercise.

I weighed in today and I lost 1 pound. Which is totally good, but a little lackluster in comparison to my mom's loss of 7. But the leader told us last week that we were allowed to share with each other but not compare ourselves to eachother. I think that is a fantastic mandate but is easier said than done. My mom was really on top of everything though.

What worked for me:
-buying a few Lean Cuisine frozen dinners and leaving them in the freezer at work
-taking the stairs instead of the elevators if it was four floors or less
-drinking water before I even left my house
-talking to K about how it all works

What I need to work on this week:
-following the healthy guidelines as closely as I can
-walking extra in addition to the stairs (I'm going to stay with four floors though, I'm not superwoman)
-saving some points for when I go home after work
-having more healthy foods in the apartment that are easy to grab and go
-reading the bulletin boards at the web site and talking to my mom about what is working for her

Total progress:
Week 1= -1

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

are you watching the show life yet?!

It's on tonight on NBC 9pm/8pm Central.

God is good and has provided. He is still in control. Everything is going to be alright.

I read this awesome blog called Stuff Christians Like and the guy who writes it mentioned that there is a blog every Christian blogger must write the day after the election. So that's where my title came from. You should check the link out, even if you used to go to church or a Christian college but don't anymore because it is highly likely you will find many a post hilarious.

I have to say that I am excited and proud that Obama not only won the Electoral College votes but the popular vote. The Senate and House now have Democrat majorities and I am almost giddy to see how things change. The past eight years have taken their toll on a lot of aspects of America and it truly is time for some things to change. I have every bit of confidence in Barack Obama to be the agent of change, to surround himself with a great group of advisers, and to make good picks for the Supreme Court when it comes to that.

All in all, I am a happy girl. And who knew that this election would be called by 11 pm?!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

the job dilemia

I currently work 3 pm to 11 pm at a hospital as a secretary. Sometimes I really like it because I learn random medical kinds of things and some of the people I work with are really fantastic. Sometimes I hate it because I do not get credit for most of what I do, doctors can be cruel, and nurses have high stress jobs that sometimes mean they take things out on people that have nothing to do with what is causing their headaches. The hours are alright. I like being able to sleep in a little bit and I never have to deal with traffic. It is a little hard to have a social life because almost everyone else has to get up earlier than I do which means they go to bed earlier too. Family time is relegated to weekends.

A friend mentioned the possibility of there being an opening I'm qualified for at the place where she works. I went ahead and emailed the contact she gave me just to get more information and I'll just kind of see what happens. I haven't even heard back but it kind of has me thinking. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to find something in the 8 am to 5 pm realm. I don't think it would be that hard to find the same pay rate I currently have if not actually a higher wage. I definitely need health insurance that isn't going to drain my checking account but that's the biggest thing I'd have questions about.

So what do I do? How do I decide? I have a perfectly decent job and I know the demons I have to deal with. I had a bad day last week and one of my co-workers told me I didn't really have it all that bad. I guess she's right but sometimes I really don't think they understand all the stuff I have to do that is surrounded by attitudes and general grumpiness. But is that really going to be different at any other job?

Maybe I'm dissatisfied because I've been there for awhile and I'm bored. I've had a strong case of wanderlust for a long time and since I haven't moved, maybe that has transferred itself into my job. I think it would be truly awesome if I could just quit and go to school full-time. But I do believe that opportunity has completely passed me by.

Monday, November 3, 2008

ww goals

Okay, so this is what I decided about Weight Watchers goals for myself. I want some stuff to look forward to which could be seen as bribing myself or simply marking milestones that I make for myself. Either way, this is what I've got so far:

-10 pounds: haircut
This gives me some time to figure out what I want and to ask friends where they go for a haircut. I will probably land on Supercuts, but you never know. And 10 pounds is something that I can do that shouldn't take that long and is an amount that should be marked with some kind of something.

-25 pounds: find out about becoming a Mary Kay consultant (or whatever the official word is)
I need to spend some more time thinking about it but I think I could rake in some cash from co-workers if I were to be selling Mary Kay stuff. Doing parties would be fun and like I said before I love the skin care items I have and can definitely sell something I believe in.

Hmm, I guess that's all I've got so far. That's enough to keep me on track this week though!

Sunday, November 2, 2008

my appearance

Mary Kay skin care stuff is seriously kickass. I love it and I've only been using it for a few days. I'm totally sold. I guess the next step is to get actual makeup, but I'm pretty set on eyeshadow and whatnot for the time being. After I drop some weight, I think I might look into becoming a consultant or whatever because I can totally sell stuff I believe in. I just don't know that anyone would take me seriously at the moment in my ridiculously unglamorous norm.

My hair has gotten pretty long again. I kind of like and it kind of drives me crazy at the same time. I need a trim and some layers to make it look nice and like I did something to it on purpose. But the past week or so as I've been thinking about maybe actually styling it before going to work instead of showering and waiting for it to air dry a little bit and sticking it all in a ponytail, I've noticed how dry the ends are. I'm toying with the idea of getting a mildly drastic haircut. K didn't seem too distraught at the idea when I bounced it off him today. My mom will hate the idea, but then she'll like my hair when I actually get it cut. So now I just need to figure out what I want it to look like and if I should just do it whenever or if I should make it a weight loss goal reward.

My mom and I just restarted Weight Watchers together. I'll start doing specific updates again starting on Thursday since that's our meeting day. I'm really excited about it and pleased with our decision to go together and everything. I can drop 10 pounds without a lot of struggle and then it all unravels. I asked my mom if we could go together because she will be a great encouragement to me even without being very specific. Plus she always has great new snack discoveries. So far, it's going alright. This weekend has not been fantastic, but I made better decisions this weekend than I did last weekend and I am aware of how it could have been even better. I think that's how it all works. Eventually it adds up into it just being a state of mind rather than having to immediately going to log everything you eat after every meal or snack. I am slightly mortified about how much I currently weigh, so I'll probably just mention how much I've lost/gained each week without giving a total.

I just want to say again that I love the fall time change. Did you know that for up to three days after the time change in the fall there are less heart attacks and that for up to three days after the spring time change there are MORE heart attacks? It's all a matter of sleep. Make sure you're getting enough!

it's november, how did that happen?!?

In the spirit of NaNoWriMo (is that right?), I'm going to try to post a blog every day for this month. I don't know how well I will do, but I will try. K is doing the novel writing thing and based on his recent drawing attempts, I'm pretty excited to see the result. My man is this amazing artist who doesn't seem to be completely aware how impressive his drawings are. Especially when he insists they are just sketches. My mom wants one of his sketches, literally as is, in a frame for Christmas.

Here's my random news for this post. My sister is pregnant! She is having a rough bout of not being able to keep anything down for very long. She was throwing up at one point and my niece went into the bathroom crying. My sister told her she was okay and it wouldn't last too much longer but she was just a little sick. My niece kept crying and then told my sister "I just don't want you to throw the baby up!" Four year olds are seriously the best.

Don't forget to change your clocks! Just another reason why fall makes me happy, an extra hour of sleep. :)

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

i feel like i'm taking crazy pills!

Something that I love about me and K is that I completely adore movies that have little to no plot but make you laugh hysterically and he only tolerates them. I'm not a completely pushover for a stupid movie, but give me one based on an SNL sketch or something along those lines and I'm pretty much guaranteed to love it. Night at the Roxbury is amongst my favorites and I really do need to add Zoolander and Mystery Men to my collection at some point. K gamely watches these movies with me and laughs fairly heartily as well, but I think it's more at my intense enjoyment of such stupid cinematic offerings and not really at the movie itself.

Last night my dear friend Splenda, aka Kate, was over for a little one on one girl time before we met up with some more girls at a fabulous bistro-ish place for dinner, and we marveled at K's laughter through the closed bedroom door while he was watching The Family Guy. He has a really deep voice anyway and his laugh is loud and contagious and I think we both thought the door was open and were startled to discover it had been in fact closed. He told me once that his mom and sister hated him watching Conan because they'd already be in bed and he'd wake them up with his laughter even though the tv wasn't really near either one of them.

All that to say, laughing with K is one of my favorite things.

Monday, October 20, 2008

quick and dirty

I think the ants read my blog. I now have an ant bite IN BETWEEN TWO TOES. It looks like my toe is swollen because of the damn welt.

Also, I pulled a back muscle the other day and spent most of Sunday in misery in bed on top of a heating pad. I guess all the pain medicine caught up with my stomach and that twisting and turning just woke me up. I ate a little cereal (if you haven't had Cinnamon Toast Crunch any time recently, do yourself a favor and get a box. It's heaven) and some Rolaids. Basically, I'm a freaking mess. And today is probably the day where they will freak out if I try to be late or leave early from work.

Back to my warm bed...

Sunday, October 19, 2008

spinach dip

Yesterday I hosted a Mary Kay party at my mom's house and I made spinach dip because I had a hankering for it. Everyone raved about it which made me feel a little sheepish because to me, spinach dip is such a whip it up last minute kind of thing that I felt a little bad getting accolades for it. So because I believe everyone should know the joy of an impressive yet amazingly easy dip, here's the recipe:

Spinach Dip

16 oz sour cream
1 cup mayo
1 4 oz can of water chestnuts drained and roughly chopped
10 oz package of frozen spinach, thawed and excess water squeezed out
large loaf of crusty bread (sourdough or french bread are my faves)

Mix everything except for the bread together and chill for at least an hour. Then serve with chunks of the crusty bread. An especially impressive serving idea is to hollow out a round loaf of bread and put the dip in there. Cut the bread you hollow out into chunks and serve for dipping. Then be prepared for gushing compliments.

Friday, October 17, 2008

five tv shows I love

Life

Holy crap, why are you not watching this show?! It's about a cop who was in jail for a murder he didn't commit. He was found innocent after seven years in jail where he took up meditation and Zen ideals to get through being in jail as a cop. He got a bunch of money and reinstated as a detective. The cases are crazy, the characters are fantastic and deep, and Charlie is quirky and smart and trying to figure out who framed him on the side. For reals, start watching this show immediately if not sooner.

Grey's Anatomy

It had me from the very first episode. I would think there's only so much you can do with a show that takes place mostly in a hospital, but every episode makes me tear up at least once. Working in a hospital myself means that I realize McDreamy is really only a figment of the writers' imagination but I still am entertained by the show. Then there's a blog that gets posted by the main writer of the episode the day after which offers all kinds of cool insight and has only made me a bigger fan.

The Office

Hysterical. Stomach pain inducing laughter occurs almost every single episode. And, they only get funnier the more times you watch the same episode! If you start watching from the very beginning, you have to give yourself a few episodes to get into it. It's unlike any other show on American television (at least as far as I've been exposed to). But it is hysterical. Steve Carrell is fantastic at being earnestly idiotic and the whole Jim and Pam thing is heart-warming even when it's heart breaking. Watch and you'll know what I mean.

House

I kind of like watching this show on dvd or in some sort of other marathon format. It's another hospital show which I suppose begs the question of whether or not working in a hospital makes me predisposed to enjoying medically influenced television. Every episode is kind of the same in that there's a medical mystery, the first diagnosis is wrong, and then something weird happens that makes House or someone else realize what is really going on. But the characters are really deep and the interactions are unpredictable in some ways and I can't help but be completely sucked into the whole thing. Also, it is a fantastic juxtaposition of the world view that was common in the 50s with the world view of today. The 50s were much more black and white and science based (which is represented by Dr. House) and today we live in many more gray areas and focus on feelings and reactions more than facts and if/than kinds of situations. I just nerded it up real good for ya, didn't I.

Family Guy

Okay, years ago when it had been canceled and the only way you could watch it was on dvd, someone lent it to me and swore it was the funniest show EVER. I couldn't get into it. I love The Simpsons. But in the past couple of years, Family Guy has definitely grown on me. Probably because you can watch it every night on a variety of channels. I love the interactions between Stewie and Brian the most. I think it would kind of be funnier if the family didn't really understand Stewie, but then it would be hard to make the conversations between Stewie and Brian happen and that's definitely the best part of any episode. Somewhat offensive and ridiculous, and sometimes over the top, but I still am entertained by the show. I pretty much just watch it on Cartoon Network though so I'm not all up to date on the latest episodes. Incidently, I LOVE Adult Swim. The Oblongs and Mission Hill could make it onto my favorites list if there were more episodes available for viewing.

i am allergic to ant bites

No really. When I get an ant bite, it initially hurts. Then I get a little white bump that kind of looks like it's full of puss and a huge pink welt surrounding it. When I say huge, I mean on average the circumference of a soda can and I promise you I'm not kidding. It itches like a mofo and people at work start asking me if I have a wound with MRSA or something. Nope, just a freaking ant bite. I currently have one on my arm and yesterday someone asked if it gets that bad now what it was like when I was a kid. I said when I was a kid, I lived in California where ants are civilized and do not bite you. The ones who do bite are fire ants and they advertise the fact that they bite by being red. Stupid Texan bugs. All of them bite! Everything is bigger in Texas, including the attitudes and self-importance of teeny tiny bugs.

This week started out awesome because I was going to get a whole bunch of overtime. The other secretary called in sick for the entire week because of some sort of crazy set of allergies and I was going to come in early for three days and end up with 12 hours of overtime. Tuesday I did my 12 hour shift. Wednesday I got up and into the shower and got out of the shower to a voicemail saying they didn't need me and I would be on call until my regularly scheduled time. Same thing on Thursday. Then on Thursday I got sent home early. So now, if I manage to work my entire shift today, I'm going to squeak by with a 40 hour week. This whole thing makes me very grumpy because I could so use the money and also I am feeling very sleep deprived.

K is a night owl. I thought I was a night owl until our schedules began to collide. I really can't stay up past 2 or 2:30 am if I have to work or do anything the next day. K can stay up all night except for a two hour nap and then go work a full shift and hang out or otherwise not take a nap and be pretty good to go. I think he's crazy and envy this all at the same time. Night time is our catch-up time. His schedule isn't consistent but us both being home after I get off from work is, at least for the most part. Even on the nights when I kind of just want to come inside and get straight into bed, I am distracted by the desire to tell him all about my day and hear about his. I end up staying up until at least 3 if not later and it's lovely because I think my boyfriend is amazing and funny and I love spending time with him but it's awful because then I wake up and find it difficult to be in a good mood without a whole lot of behind the eyes effort. If I start to think about what it will be like when we have kids, I want to cry. And also move, because our apartment is too small for the two of us so adding anyone else would just be stupid right now.

As falling back asleep before work today isn't really going to work, I'm totally going to play Pacman. I bought a video game (it actually has 14 arcade games total from the 80s and 90s, not just Pacman), all by myself, that not only do I think is awesome but K thinks is awesome as well. I'm prouder of myself than I really should be.

Friday, October 10, 2008

tired and grumpy may not be the best time to post a blog

I am tired of a bunch of stuff. This cold that appears and disappears and then reappears for one is really getting on my nerves. I suppose that points to it being allergies rather than a cold but I take medicine that up until the past couple of weeks has worked quite well and I simply do not have money to go to the doctor right now. So there's that.

At work I answer the phone "(Name of Department), it's Melissa." 8 out of 10 times the first thing the person on the other line says is "Who is this?" Realizing I could perhaps be saying everything quite quickly and not realizing it sounds like mush, I will slowly repeat my name. This is all reasonable until the other person then says "Oh hi, Rosa (or Elsie, or Lisa, or Laura)" or if the entire reason they were calling was to get our fax number. What does my name have to do with the fax number?

I guess I lost my mind a little when I was apartment hunting and decided a first floor place was the way to go. Next lease has got to be a spot where no one is living above me. Maybe a house. Sometimes I just sit in the living room and try to match the moving about pattern with a picture in my head and lately it mostly seems to go with someone starting at the front door and hopping back and forth. And what is the deal with the vacuuming every day? I usually vacuum once a week (more if the floor warrants it of course). The only time I've ever vacuumed daily was once when I was about thirteen and I got in trouble for something and that was part of my punishment, vacuuming every day.

I am tired of being a flake but I can't seem to stop. Once upon a time if I said I was going to be someplace or do something, it was considered almost worrisome if I was late. Now, I'm not sure anyone completely believes me when I say I'm going to do something for them. I hope they at least believe I MEAN to follow through because I truly honestly do, but what happened? How did that switch get flipped and how do I flip it back?

My blood pressure is high, I have acid reflux, and I use a heating pad almost daily to ease back aches. I honestly believe all of these issues would be helped if not completely alleviated by weight loss. So why can't I just do it? Why can't I just choose better foods, do work out videos, cut out caffeine again, and make it happen? If I lost 100 pounds, I would look amazing. If I lost 30 pounds, I could buy much cuter clothes and probably put the heating pad away. Either scenario is possible and within my reach as long as I stay dedicated. When I see pictures of myself, I see an overstuffed couch. That right there should be enough, and then factoring in the health issues, seriously, what is my deal?

I used to LOVE the Post Secret web site and looked forward to seeing new postcards every Sunday. Now I still check the site every week but the fact there are so many books and the touring and whatnot is all kind of a turn-off. It was cooler when it was a random art project instead of a source of great income for the site creator. Good for him, I guess, and it was a great idea. I'm still growing disenchanted I suppose.

My dear friend Kate, aka Splenda, recently reminded me that when she first met me I told her I knew myself very well. I don't know what happened to that confidence. I'm not sure where my list making went and the last time I wrote in my personal handwritten journal was February. Despite this grumpy blog entry, I am mostly happy in my day to day life. So what happened to the knowing myself, the lofty goals, the determination to DO something and BE someone?

No more big breakouts please. A zit here and there is fine, but do they have to be so huge? I'm 28. That fact should overrule existence of acne. It just should.

I'm running out of steam, so back to bed I go. Wish me luck on getting through my Friday at work!

oh for heaven's sake

I will discuss a multitude of things with people. I don't really like talking about politics at work unless I feel like it can be a mature discussion with no lasting hard feelings, but I'll breach that every so often. I don't expect everyone to agree with me and as long as you have a well-formed opinion that is backed by facts and reason, I will respect it even if it is the exact opposite of my opinion.

With that said, for the sake of lollipops and everything else delightful, FACT CHECK. Do not take the word of someone telling you it is so, take a few moments and Google the quote or the event or the person. Do not make a decision about voting based on on eleven year old's rant. Do not believe something just because it appears in print. Look at different sources, watch different newscasts, read a variety of news sites.

Or at the very least, don't spout off random crap that I know is not true and expect me to respect your stance on the issue we're discussing.

It is incredibly easy to see the voting record of every member of the Senate. Factcheck.org recaps the debates and lists the mistakes each candidates make and it doesn't seem like they are taking anybody's side either. Snoopes.com is a good starting point for heaven's sake!

Saturday, September 20, 2008

it's late

In a few hours I have to get up and ready for cupcake day with the babies, but I can't turn my head off and go to sleep. I have a lovely and comfortable bed and am exhausted from my week, but sometimes that doesn't add up to equal sleep for some reason.

Hurricane Ike had a significant impact on me this week. Not so much as far as the weather was concerned. It was a strange experience for me though. I grew up with earthquakes. You don't know when they will strike or what the damage will be and how many aftershocks will come. It just happens and then you figure out everything else from there. Being able to watch a hurricane come closer to where you live for a week and hear the predictions and learning about what the different classifications mean is not something I would say is in my comfort zone. It turned a little as it hit the United States which means we got a lot of clouds, some crazy orange lightening that was eerily beautiful, and a snipped of rain that was most assuredly hurricane rain because it smelled like fish and ass. That was about it for most San Antonio residents, I do believe.

However, I work in a hospital. Galveston was completely evacuated and Houston had some serious power and water issues this week. My hospital ended up with over 200 transferred patients from each city and spots in between I'm sure. I got a lot of extra hours which is good for the paycheck but not so good for the feet. The phones were ten times crazier than usual because of family members from all over the state calling to locate their loved ones. It was like being in the middle of the aftermath of a huge earthquake but strange because we were all supposed to be able to have at least a week to prepare for it all. I don't think I could handle living in a spot where tornadoes are a regular occurrence at all!

Sarah Palin as a vice-presidential nominee... Mostly what I think can be summed up by the phrase "holy crap." Jon Stewart asked if she won some sort of contest or something. I definitely fall more on the Democrat side of ideology but do not vote strictly by party. I try to weigh issues and vote for who or what I think is best. I have to say though. Obama and Biden are getting my vote. And if I could vote for them a few more times, I would. I respect McCain and his record but am tired of hearing about him being a POW and am having trouble even entertaining the idea that he would be anything but a continuance of the current Bush administration and I do not think our country can handle four more years down the road we are on without facing even more serious reprecussions than we already have.

In any case, I would like to encourage you to make sure you're registered to vote and to show up and cast your ballot. It's important. We have an amazing system in our country where the people are allowed to voice their opinion and speak their minds through official stating what they want. There will be an exchange of power that will be peaceful and respectful. And hopefully regardless of who the next President is, he will be able to unify our country a little more. I do believe each man is interested in that aspect of the office.

Things with K are so good. I really love him and I revel in the fact he truly loves me as well. We were talking sometime last week and I mentioned that we'll need to figure out where we're headed in a few months just from a practical standpoint. He got this strange look on his face. I told him I didn't mean he had to propose or we had to be married by May, but maybe he could just tell me something like he wanted to marry me but wasn't sure when. He replied with "Melissa. I want to marry you, I just don't know when." This made me really happy because although I have felt that was the case, he hasn't actually said it and I just don't have the best track record with relationships and understanding what the guy really means or where his head is really at with everything. I'm that girl who needs the actual words spoken (or written) because I cannot trust myself to assume correctly. Anyway, when I excitedly told a couple of people about this, they looked at me like I was retarded and asked how I didn't know that because everyone else certainly does. Have you ever felt good and stupid at the same time? Without alcohol involved?

I need some new blogs to read. Any suggestions?

I'm going to try to catch some sleep now. Hopefully I'll be able to do a little picture post of the cupcake extravaganza. My niece AND nephew will be meeting me at my parents' house to make TWO kinds of cupcakes with frosting and lots of sprinkles. I'm really excited. I hope they are too! I figure after we're done with the cupcake making we can do laps around the backyard to get some of the sugar worn off before my brother-in-law comes to pick them up. :)

Monday, September 1, 2008

when my niece has pigtails, she's extra cute

"Okay, let me repeat what I heard you say back to you and you tell me if that's what you're thinking."

"Okay Auntie."

"You want me to come to your house, pick you and your brother up. Then we'll drop your brother off at the movies and you and I will go to my house and make lots and lots of cupcakes. Is that right?"

"Yes. Wait. Maybe someone should stay with my brother."

"Yes, I think that's probably a good idea. He's three."

"Papa? Want to go to the movies?"

Sunday, August 17, 2008

...

I just want to say that I have been so wrapped up in a rotten work situation, thinking about my life as one big hot mess, and just generally living life that I haven't had the gumption to choose words carefully enough to publish for everyone to read. I'm sure I'll be back to posting a whole bunch again soon, but for now, probably not so much.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

oh my darlin

So for whatever reason I adore the name Clementine.

I am like every other girl I know in that ever since I was like 8 I've daydreamed details about my life in the future. And because I am a child of the 80s that future life always included a wedding, husband, and kids. I think my niece is going to grow up daydreaming about being a princess because of Disney's thorough marketing campaign, but that's a blog for another day. I have all these details I think would look fabulous in a wedding kind of setting and names I think would be fantastic for future kids of mine. To be clear, I'm not a crazy girl and I don't have anything decided in a set in stone kind of way because I hope to make those kinds of decisions with my someday husband and whatnot. The only thing I know for sure about my wedding is I have the father/daughter dance song picked out. I figure that's something I can definitely decide by myself.

Anyway.

A few years ago, I heard the name Clementine again and I just loved it. So it became my new favorite name for a baby girl but every time I mentioned it to anyone, they would grimace even after I said "Isn't Clementine Jane such a cute name? Because Jane is MY middle name?" My mom told me she'd buy me a dog so I could have my Clementine because no grandchild of hers would be a Clementine.

K and I have talked about baby names and stuff and ideas we've had before being together as a couple and we like some of each other's ideas and don't like others but I didn't even mention Clementine because it's been designated as a strange daydream in my little head. Except a week or so ago i was watching E! and one of those celebrity updates scrolled across the bottom of the screen.

Ethan Hawke and his wife had a baby girl and named her...CLEMENTINE JANE! What are the odds of that?! I called my mom and told her I was affirmed since a movie star had chosen my name for his daughter. Her immediate response was "Dear God. Please let Melissa and K have only boys. Amen."

The other night one of my all time favorite music artists, Tiffany Lee aka Plumb had a baby girl. What's her name? Clementine Fire.

Clementine is back baby! I think now my mom is praying that by the time I do have a baby girl that the name is so popular that I decide against it because I have said that any name on the past two years top ten lists is automatically disqualified.

By the way, I'm not pregnant or anything. Just a girl.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

sorry...

I just kind of haven't felt like writing lately. There's tons of stuff going on that is probably worth posting about, but for some reason I've had some writer's block. With pretty much everything. I start letters (mostly to you, Tina, sorry...), emails, surveys, everything and just not finishing them. I put a blog on my myspace because that's a theoretically safer spot to post things of a more sensitive nature since my profile is private.

But anyway...

Last night K and I went to one of his friend's birthday party. I'm not going to lie. I didn't want to go. I don't have a very good history with this particular person and even now that things are not as volitale as they once were, there's still a little tension. Or maybe just an uncomfortable feeling on both sides is more like it because we've been able to do some double dates without any major awfulness happening. My good friend Splenda came with us and through a combination of things, namely K making sure to include us both in conversation and the abundance of alcohol available even though the invitation totally said BYOB, I had a genuinely good time. I got to see some people I already knew and like hanging out with and then I got to meet some other people I've heard about here and there and some of them were super cool.

I was involved in an unoffical drinking contest. The thing about pina coladas is it is a little difficult to taste the alcohol so it kind of sneaks up on you. I have no idea how many I had. Too many to even bother trying to figure out Weight Watcher points for, heh. But I suddenly realized I was right at the line between having a good time and crossing over into what I like to call Puke City. So I notified the other participant I was done and he put up a good fight for why we should continue, but I noticed he stopped drinking too as I switched to water. He said today that we'll have to go again because the stipulation for last night was only one of us was walking away from the table and we both did.

The other thing that I really enjoyed was that all of K's friends know we moved in together and so that was a topic for discussion last night for a few minutes. Almost all of them seem genuinely happy and kind of excited even about this recent development. Someone asked us if we were getting married and when I said we were talking about it, but we're kind of at the very beginning of talking about it, they were really excited for us. It's really fun to be happy about something going on in your life and share it with someone else and have them be happy for you too, you know?

All in all, it was a good night. And kind of help make up for the fact that the new X-Files movie, the one I've been looking forward to seeing for roughly a year and got to see yesterday morning, was awful. Maybe they can make another one in a couple of years and redeem themselves. SATC can go ahead and make another one in a couple of years as well. Getting movies out of The West Wing and Friends might be a little too much though, but I will take continuing storylines from X-Files and Sex and the City as long as they churn them out. Unless the next X-Files movie is as rotten as this one was. David Duchovny is still yummy. Even with a crazy unabomber beard and everything. :)

I've got one more day off and then it'll be back to my typical somewhat stressful work week. In anticipation of which I plan to do not much of anything for most of the day tomorrow. Right after I clean the bathroom, take out all the trash, and maybe vaccuum.

Friday, July 4, 2008

hope floats makes me fall asleep every time i try to watch it

I have been thinking about hope a lot over the past few days. There's a movie preview where the tag line is something like hope didn't give up on (insert name). I don't think hope has given up on me either. I find myself hoping for a lot of things. Some of them are not very significant or important to other people like how I hope I can find whatever magical combination of ant sprays and apartment office intervention to avoid being bitten in places that are awkard to scratch in social situations. I hope that this weekend brings me enough time to clean up my living room in a way that when I open the door after a long day at work, I breathe a sigh of comfort. I hope my new birth control pills drastically change my menstrual experience in all ways and forms. And if they could clear up my face that'd be awesome as well. It's only been a week so there's definitely still hope on both counts of that one.

We'll see what happens!

Monday, June 9, 2008

vodka tonics are my drink of choice at the moment

My dear friend Splenda is back in town and it is so incredibly nice to be able to just meet up with her for drinks any old time (practically anyway, we both do have moderately ridiculous schedules). Tonight was the first time in a long time that I had more than one or two drinks at a bar! It wasn't just Kate or anything. That's just where it started. My boyfriend met up with us and then some more people came too and all in all I have to say that Sunday night is definitely the best night to have some drinks. It's not all crazy karaoke loud and sometimes Sunday nights are just a good time to have some vodka and laugh at old memories.

Monday, June 2, 2008

fantastic recipe: easy homemade hummus

Hummus is a dip that is most often enjoyed with pita bread. It's also fantastic with veggies, crackers, or a toasted English muffin. It's a good way to get some extra fiber in and although I don't have a calorie breakdown for you, I do know it's a pretty healhty snack (depending on what you enjoy it with, of course).

I got this recipe off the back of a bottle of McCormick ground cumin.

Ingredients:

1 15 oz can of chickpeas (garbanzo beans)
1 clove garlic
1 tbsp lemon juice
1 tsp ground cumin
1/4 tsp ground red pepper
1/4 tsp salt

Drain the can of chickpeas but reserve the liquid. Put all ingredients except the reserved liquid in a food processor or blender. Blend until it has a smooth consistancy, adding small amounts of liquid at a time. Serve with pita bread or pita chips!

Make sure you put any remaining hummus in the fridge. It will probably taste even better the next day as the flavors have more time to meld.

fantastic recipe: proper cosmopolitan

2 oz vodka
1 oz cranberry juice
1 oz lime juice
1/2 oz cointreau (or other orange liquer)

Shake with ice, strain into a glass, and enjoy!

It will be a light pink color because vodka is the main ingredient, not cranberry juice. It will also be strong, as most martinis are.

movie review monday: sex and the city

SPOILERS AT THE BOTTOM. IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE MOVIE AND WANT TO, STOP READING AT "FAVORITES"

Ahhh, Sex and the City. I love it, I really do.

I worked at Blockbuster a few years ago and we got five free rentals a week which was definitely the best part of the job. I decided to get the first season of Sex and the City because there was still quite a buzz about it and I've never had HBO so I had no idea what it was all about. For whatever reason, the first season managed to completely hook me and I watched and eventually bought all the seasons. I have seen every single episode a multitude of times. I've had marathon viewings with friends, and just basically love the series. Yes, there's a lot of sex. But more than sex, I think the point of the series is relationships. The friendships between the women, and the dating (and later more serious) relationships they have with men and all the dynamics inbetween. I'm not super into fashion, shoes, makeup, or glamor so I think that's the best testament to what I'm saying about relationships being front and center in the series.

So, when the movie was announced as being back on and then when actual production started, I stayed on top of the information enough to find out when it was being released and then did my best to avoid any further information. I even managed to skip over commercials and previews! I got the day off from work and when I told my boyfriend's sister about it, she got half a day off from work and we bought tickets in advance for her, myself, and K. We made cosmopolitans at my apartment and then trekked over to the theater to wait in line.

I think there were about five guys in the full theater and most of the women were dressed up. I think a lot of them came from work, but a good portion of them definitely got dressed up just to see the movie. It was fun to be in an audience that applauded when the music started and understood some of the scenes that were only funny if you knew the characters.

I loved the movie. It wasn't particularly special or movie-esque though. It was kind of like watching half a season's worth of episodes all at once more than watching a movie. I hope that if they do make another one they go with more of a movie plot rather than a bunch of little plots that add up to two and a half hours. But I thought the story lines were great. It was like visiting with old friends.

I would love to go see it again, so anyone in the area who wants to go, just let me know! And now I'm going to list my favorite and least favorite parts so if you haven't seen the movie and still want to, STOP READING NOW.




















Favorite parts:
-cameos from people I did not expect to be in the movie at all, like Enid
-the take/toss/store fashion show in Carrie's apartment
-the love letters
-Louise from St. Louis' renting habit
-acknowledging the women were older
-Charlotte's girls' names
-When Charlotte saw Big and actually used her opening line and added a hand motion. That scene, because the look of surprise and pride on her face after actually getting to do it was fantastic.
-Big's proposal

Thing that were lacking:
-more interaction between Charlotte and Harry. Cutest family ever
-it taking Miranda so long to come to her senses.
-Carrie's shoes. Or lack of them rather.
-More cameos from characters of seasons past would have been great. It wasn't absolutely necessary but could have been really cool if done right. And maybe that was the whole problem.

Overall, I loved it. I'll definitely buy it when it comes out and probably watch it five thousand times, just like the rest of the SATC dvds I've got. :)

Monday, May 26, 2008

someday i want a wii of my very own

Today was pretty nice. I got to sleep in a little bit and then just as I was about to start leisurely getting ready for work, I got a phone call saying it was super slow so they were just going to put me on call. I have a feeling that I could have argued my way into going in but I think sometimes it's just better to go with the flow. Especially when it means an unexpected day off!

I unpacked some more stuff, organized things a little bit, did some laundry... K came over after he was done working for a little while which was definitely a nice and unexpected plus of the day. We went over to my parent's house and played with their new Wii and ate pizza and drank margaritas. It was a lot of fun having a nice low-key kind of evening.

The other day I went to Weight Watchers and while I was standing in line waiting for my turn to step on the scale, I got my little booklet and stuff out. Then I realized I hadn't been in a month. This bummed me out because I really had no idea that it had been an entire month. I gained three pounds, which by itself isn't a huge deal. I can work that right off my booty in a couple of weeks as long as I stay on top of everything again. I am more dissappointed by the fact that I let an entire month go by without counting points or weighing in without even realizing it. I feel like this is something I do to myself a lot and I have no idea how to break that pattern.

Yesterday was fun too though. Sushi for my dad's birthday celebration, playing Wii games, and running around with my niece and nephew making them laugh hysterically. I don't know what it is exactly, but I have ALWAYS been able to make my niece laugh harder for longer than I've seen others do. Not that I'm the only one she likes to play with, but it makes my heart so happy to run around with her and have her shrieking with laughter like that. It'll make me smile for a week just to remember it for a minute.

All in all, things are good albeit a tiny bit boring. Sometimes that's not really so bad though. :)

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

i hate ants.

I grew up in California where the bugs are annoying but not malicious. Now I'm in Texas and I have to say that quite frankly it pisses me off that little teeny tiny ants bite. And it freaking hurts when they do! And what is the point of them biting me? All that happens is that I cuss at them and then totally squish them. And these are not even fire ants. These are a handful of black ants wandering around here and there in my apartment. They're all going to die next Tuesday though.

I only feel this violently towards ants, don't worry.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

a 10 hour saturday at work

Yesterday I worked a 10 hour shift. I don't know exactly how this happened or what I was thinking when I said it'd be fine because last night I was seriously exhausted. Luckily it wasn't a very busy day, just lots of cleaning and wiping people's butts because I was part secretary but mostly nurse's aide. I seriously love the two nurses that I worked with yesterday. I don't think I could work on a Saturday with the other set of nurses that work on the weekends together, but anytime these two needed me, I'd do it again. Even knowing how ridiculously tired I will be at the end of the night.

There was one patient who was this sweet old lady who was getting a blood transfusion. She was a little bit confused, but not completely out of it. Her brother actually brought her in for the transfusion and we got her all comfortable in a recliner with the tv on in a spot right by the nurse's station in case she got extra confused and needed a little more attention. I had to take vital signs every hour and every time she had something new to tell me that made giggle a little bit. One time I went to start getting her blood pressure and she said "Well, Kennedy is resting comfortably, let's hope the rest of us are." It was kind of an astute observation. Then the patient in the slot next to hers starting moaning again because he was in pain (and to be honest, a bit of a drama queen), and she frowned and then said "Well, Kennedy is resting comfortably, let's hope the rest of us are." This made me want to laugh like crazy, but I just smiled and asked her if I could get her anything at all.

Later on I went to take her vital signs and realized her pants were hanging over the little garbage can. I have no idea when exactly it happened, but she had an accident and just took her pants off and laid them in the trash can. She was still sitting in her recliner and had a towel daintly draped across her crossed legs. At first glance, it seemed like she had just gotten cold, but it was definitely her pants in the trash can. I got her some scrub pants and gathered some wipes and stuff and went into her room.

"Mrs. R, do you need some clean pants?"

She took a peek under the towel and said "Why, I don't have any on, so I guess I do!"

I cleaned her all up, got her in the scrub pants, cleaned up the recliner and got her a fresh sheet and pillow. I told her to just let me know if she needed anything at all and she put her little hand on my arm and said "You're a good man, Charlie Brown."

Seriously, it's things like this that make me want to stay in the medical field forever. Little touches of compassion and patience go such a long way and it just makes me feel good to do something nice for someone, even if I know they probably won't even remember it tomorrow.

I definitely like days like yesterday better than the ones spent answering the phone with rude doctors on the other end who would like to know why I haven't read their minds yet.

...

There is something to be said for living in a place where the store brand jalapeno poppers are considerably more spicy than the name brand jalapeno poppers.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

who knew you could fit so much into one kitchen?

I had a lot of moving help on Saturday and I got almost everything packed up and ready to go. I have some odds and ends here and there, things on the wall, and most of the kitchen left to bring to the new place. I've done two trips where I had needed to take care of some other things and stopped by my old place and filled up my truck cab with stuff from the kitchen. Today I realized that this method is going to take forever. I need to go there after work tonight and just empty out all the cabinets and load up my truck and bring it all home. I will just have to wait to catch up on sleep and other things like setting up my gym routine again until next week when I only have one apartment in my name.

But I do have cable, internet, and phone. And something else that's awesome is I totally have an intrusion alarm on my apartment. Don't be trying to break in, EVERYONE will know! And, even with all the stuff I have left to do, I feel like half of my usual stress load has been lifted right off my shoulders. My new place already feels like home. Even with the boxes and the kitchen especially being in such disarray.

Yay for such a great move!

Sunday, May 4, 2008

this is the most grown up looking apartment i've ever had

First of all I have to say my dad will be proud but probably shake his head at me when I tell him that I turned my computer on just to see if there were any unprotected wireless networks I could borrow for the day and immediately found on. I'm not going to cancel my own actual internet service or anything, but it sure is nice to sit and relax with some bloggin' before I get back to all the unpacking and figuring out what else I need to buy and when to do it and all of that madness. :)

My new apartment is fantastic. There is still some stuff in my old place and I still need to clean it up a little but I am going to be actually living at the new place from now (well, yesterday) on. The cool thing is that the people who helped me move think it is just as great as I do. It's extra fun when other people get excited with you about something you've done or bought or have looked forward to. I'm still working on putting all the furniture where it will really be and I have two items that I am starting to lean more and more towards getting rid of but I am a little hesitant to make that decision final. I don't know what to do with them though!

K was super grumpy last night and I have learned that sometimes it is better to just let him be when he's grumpy because then he'll eventually tell me what's bothering him. I used to ask him what was going on and he'd deny anything was on his mind and get even grumpier. You learn a lot about someone in two years of dating I suppose. Anyway, something that I admire about him that annoys me at the same time is the fact he adjusts so well to his surroundings and circumstances that he rarely wonders what things would be like if they were different. I am envious in some ways because until very recently I've had one foot out the door at all times. With jobs, with where I've lived, with relationships in some ways, just in everything. I often have to tell myself to only do one thing at a time so I can have time to actually enjoy just where I'm at instead of staring off wistfully into the distance wondering what's coming up next. K doesn't really do that. A little bit, sure, but he's never spent an afternoon thinking about which foriegn country he would most like to live in for a year and thought of a possible way to make it happen. I think that's fun to do sometimes.

Something I did not know that he explained to me was that he just simply doesn't like change. He doesn't like having to get to know a new area. He doesn't like things being different. Even if the new thing is better, he just doesn't like it at first. So he's grumpy because I moved. We have to get to know a different neighborhood and find new little hole in the wall places to eat close to my apartment. He has to drive a different way to work. My apartment looks different. The stuff in the kitchen is going to be in different spots. I'm glad he knows exactly why he is grumpy and decided to tell me, but I'm just hoping he'll get over it soon. Especially because I am super stoked to be here and I think this was a fantastic decision and move in a lot of different ways.

There's a lot of stuff I need to take care of to be able to just go to bed tonight and go to work tomorrow without jumping through ten different hoops to get ready. Plus, my mom is cooking salmon tonight. I could make it myself, but I've had a hankering for it for awhile and I can't make it for myself any old time and have dinner with my grandmother at the same time. It's a good deal all around to hang out with the fam tonight. :)

Thursday, May 1, 2008

weight watchers unofficial update

Oh yeah! I forgot to mention that I have lost 10 pounds through Weight Watchers so I got my second little star sticker. I love stars so this works out extra well for me. :)

My clothes are fitting better, I feel better, and I feel motivated to keep on going.

The other day at work, someone commented that I look different from my name badge picture. I started talking about how my hair is different and she politely listened and then said "No, I mean it looks like you've lost some weight."

Yay!

i could make an AWESOME fort in my living room right now

I'm moving on Saturday! I am very excited about this. I have lived in my current place for a year and nine months and it's been fine, but I'm really looking forward to the new apartment. It's closer to work and it's a tiny bit bigger and a tiny bit cheaper. The price difference is enough to cover my cell phone bill so that's cool with me. The kitchen and the bathroom are a little bit smaller than in my current placce, but I'd rather have a bigger living area in exchange so that's cool. Plus, the bathroom is not actually in my bedroom, which again, not a big deal but so nice for it to be that way.

Before the exciting part of moving everything in and deciding where everything goes and then making plans to invite people over for dinner and a movie night or just to hang out for a bit, I have to finish pack everything up and get it moderately organized so the people that have so graciously agreed to help don't find the whole task to be arduous. I hate packing. I really seriously do. I don't even really like packing for small trips. I either end up with too much or too little. You'd think packing everything I own would be fun because it's a good opportunity to evaluate whether or not I really need all this stuff, but no. It's a pain in my ass.

The packing does lead to unpacking which I am a fan of. I like getting to decide where everything goes and making a new place feel like home. I'm excited to explore my new neighborhood and find where the good grocery story and Target are and all of that stuff. Should be good times!

Sunday, April 20, 2008

10 things I thought about last week

1. I am getting burnt out at work and therefore need to take a couple of weeks that I only work 40 hours. I'm not quite sure when that will happen exactly, but I think Monday is a good day to sit down and talk to my boss about putting it on the calendar.

2. Apartment hunting is a huge pain in the ass. First of all, you have to find places to go look at. Then you need to figure out if it's worth your time to actually go to the complex and walk around and whatnot. Sometimes when you call, you find out the office people work on commission because you can't get them to give you a straight answer on whether or not the size apartment you want is available and they suggest coming in within the hour to make sure their "last one until July" is snatched up.

3. I think I have a place to move into now though. I'll know for sure in a couple of days and I'm not super worried but I sure would like it to be for reals so I can stop looking through the little books and at web sites and making phone calls. Also I need a good solid motivating factor to pack and go through my crap to make sure I really want to take it with me. Any input on living on the first floor vs the third floor is greatly appreciated!

4. There is no proper way to try to explain to your boyfriend why working 50 hours a week is so different than working 35 hours a week without sounding like a self-important or self-absorbed jerk.

5. My legs hurt like a mofo earlier this week and my back is killing me this weekend. I think ordering new work shoes online was the smart thing to do. Hopefully they make a marked difference quickly because I can't think of anything else to fix the problem. I would like to avoid taking various pain killer medicines every day if at all possible.

6. I feel as though I am perpetually grumpy.

7. Sometimes I feel like a jerk for not really wanting to do stuff with people from work on the weekends based mostly on the fact that I just want a freaking break from that place on the two days I don't get paid to care about what happens at the hospital. The work weeks have been rough for the last few months and I don't want to talk about it at all on Saturday and Sunday because I HAVE to talk about it Monday through Friday. But some of the people I work with are really lovely and I feel like I'm missing out by not hanging out with them when they invite me. I don't know.

8. It's Fiesta time in San Antonio. I don't really know anything about it.

9. My family is a really great group of people. Even the extended members that sometimes frustrate me because I don't understand where they are coming from and they don't understand where I am coming from either make me feel lucky to be a part of my family.

10. As soon as I can do it without sacrificing groceries or gas for it, I'm ordering some sort of acne dissappearing kit and the good kind of makeup from Sephora. And maybe some Philosophy bodywash/bubble bath. I am at the beginning stages of desperately needing to feel like a pretty and moderately pampered girl again.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

wednesday wonders

Happy things!

...going to the gym after work. It's late and maybe a little scary walking back out into the parking lot, but it feels so great to sweat off stress and frustration and get my heart in a tiny bit better shape. The new plan is three times a week no matter what! So far, so good. :)
...vodka tonics. My new favorite drink when I am in a drink having mood.
...free boxes from Starbucks and the hospital.
...getting pretty close to knowing where I'm going to move to.
...dinner with K and my parents on Sunday night. The Thai food was delicious. How can you not love coconut milk curry?
...going to leave from dinner with K and my parents and then standing in the parking lot talking for another half hour. It is fantastic that my boyfriend is so comfortable around my family.
...having WW points at the end of the day after coming home from work and being able to have a nice little snack before bedtime. I feel like this is a habit I need to break at some point but right now as long as I'm within my points I think it's alright.
...eating ridiculous amounts of fruit. Do you know how delicious an orange is when you keep it in the fridge? It's fantastic. And if you haven't sliced the top off a kiwi and scooped it out with a spoon any time recently, go to the grocery store immediately.
...feeling more confident as a nurses's aide.
...laughing cow reduced fat spreadable cheese. I freaking love that stuff. And I love all the flavors. And I love that the last three times I've bought it I've had a coupon.
...coupons.
...I hate the circumstances, but I am ridiculously happy my dear friend Splenda is moving back to San Antonio in a month or so. It's going to be so kickass!
...good paychecks.
...making out with K.
...K calling me at work to tell me he misses me and he is getting kind of grumpy because he hasn't seen me in a few days. I'm sorry he's a grouch but I like knowing how much he loves me.
...air conditioning.
...Carmex.

Monday, April 7, 2008

anyone?

K and I will have been dating for two years next month and I would like to celebrate. Money is somewhat tight and I'll be moving right around our anniversary as well. But I was wondering if anyone had any ideas on something for us to do. So far we've thought of staying someplace for one or two nights or going out to dinner at a restaurant we don't normally go to. Any specific ideas of places or restaurants would be much appreciated, but also any vague ideas anyone has would help too.

So what have you done for anniversaries? It doesn't have to be a super serious solemn event. But we figure two years is worth marking somehow. :)

weight watchers week 3 (again)

This week was not the phenomenon last week was but I think that's probably to be expected. No stars for me today! I lost .2 pounds. It's still a loss, so that's good. But I'm a little bummed.

But I know where things went wrong. Weekdays are always easier than the weekends because I don't eat much before or after work and it's been fairly easy to bring my own food and only eat that while I'm there. The weekends are where it gets tricky because I have a lot more free time on my hands and I have a boyfriend who is much more interested in fast food than healthy home cooking. It's not his fault, don't get me wrong. But I need to be a little stronger and more intentional with weekend eating. And also with not eating before going to weigh in on Monday morning.

Last week I ate a lot more frozen meals. I don't think that's necessarily bad, but I think it was easier to stay on top of things by not eating so many frozen meals. When I'm thinking more about what I'm eating and taking more time to plan out my day, it goes a little smoother. I think anyway.

We'll see this week!

As of week three: -9.2 pounds.

Sunday, April 6, 2008

venting

Last week was particularly difficult for me at work. I feel like that's all I say when I talk about work and that it's been that way since sometime in December. We've been really busy and I've been feeling crushed on both sides. The hospital is full so beds aren't being assigned and then administrators are coming by and asking us to do things I'm sure they feel are simple but they just are not. Patients and family members are worried and nervous and not in the best of moods or very understanding when it comes to not getting the answers they would like. Doctors are frustrated because they aren't getting satisfying answers as to why their patients have to wait for a bed. And then finally, I absolutely know they don't mean it, but the nurses I work with dump on me as much as everyone else sometimes.

One of the nurses is someone I always enjoy talking to because she has a way of either making me laugh at myself or helping me understand the bigger picture without being condescending. I like talking to her about everything really and she's shown me the most about my job by far too. I told her on Thursday that I had just had it. I was sick of being talked to like I'm an idiot or like I'm someone intentionally trying to piss doctors off. I'm sick of people expecting me to pull things out of my ass for them to do their job when they are the ones who forgot whatever it is they need in the first place. I'm sick of getting dumped on by everyone, whether they mean it or not. She just laughed and said I shouldn't care so much. I know. I do. There are times when it doesn't bother me at all. I can let it slide off my back and barely give it another thought. There wasn't any one thing that was such a ridiculous event during the entire week that it wrecked everything. Rather, it was the culmination of events. It was the mulitple comments and complaints, the irritation I fielded, the general piss poor attitudes of those around me.

I am finding myself slipping into a mode where I expect everyone to realize I am a person with genuine feelings and emotions and unfortuantely I feel that as a secretary that is really dangerous. It's not going to happen. For good or bad, most of the time I am the voice on the other end of the phone and I am the body that sits in the chair that is supposed to know everything about anything happening in the unit and most of the rest of the hospital. It has nothing to do with 27 year old Melissa who dreams of a degree in psychology, being married and having babies, and living in a place where it snows in the winter.

On the flip side of that though, I need to realize that the angry doctor in front of me could be angry because one of his favorite patients died yesterday and he couldn't do anything to stop it. The nurse delegating everything she possibly can to me might be having a hard time concentrating because something happend with her kids that morning and she wants to make sure the patients don't feel the reprecussions of it. I don't really think everyone is being bitchy just because they feel like it so I need to stop acting like everything is personal.

Easier said than done.

But I finally feel like the rest of my life is going pretty well again and maybe that can carry me through rough days at work. I'm losing weight and feeling really good about it, money is going pretty well, I get to pick another apartment to live in and go through all my stuff and par down and that's always good, and no matter what happens during the week I get to spend most of the weekend with the love of my life and not much else makes me happier than that.

Monday, March 31, 2008

weight watchers week 2 (again)

I went and weighed in this morning and stayed for the meeting. They start weighing people half an hour before the meeting starts and I got there ten minutes before the meeting figuring that was enough time to weigh in and not have to sit forever waiting around. Unfortuantely it meant I missed the beginning part of the meeting because of a combination of everyone else having the same idea and there only being one person doing the weigh ins and that particular person having a VERY difficult time handling the computer. I'm not going to lie, I have a hard time being patient with people having so many issues with computers. I try really hard to not show irritation but this is one of those things that just gets my goat. That and "your" instead of "you're". I usually keep it to myself though, don't worry.

Anyway, I weighed in and she asked if it was okay if they gave me my reward in front of everyone. I said sure because I figured it was something for being back on the second week. Then I snuck a look as I walked into the meeting room and saw that I had lost NINE POUNDS. 9! That's insane. I want to lose 10 pounds in my first four weeks and I'd say that I'm doing quite well on that. It's awesome but kind of embarassing too. I didn't eat any fast food last week and I ate a lot of vegetables and fruit. I stayed away from soda and candy too but I didn't feel like I was deprived at all. It's embarassing that making a few changes resulted in such a phenomenal result right off the bat. But I will be continuing, nonetheless!

Things that worked:
-taking a big ol' bag of food to work every day. I didn't buy any food at work this week which was better for my wallet and obviously also for my waistline.
-drinking plenty of water every day. I had been doing this anyway, but I made sure I was getting enough every day according to the guidelines. I also drank some water rather than going straight for juice or soda when I was thirsty.
-eating fruit every day. This satisfied hunger better than I thought it would and took away cravings for sweet stuff.
-when someone offered me my favorite candy, I took two instead of taking a handful. I still ate some but didn't overdo it.

Things I want to work on this week:
-drinking more milk. I pretty much met the dairy guidelines every day but only barely and not so much on purpose. My nails have started breaking more so I definitely need some more milk in my diet.
-going to the gym on a regular basis again.
-continuing with the bringing food to work.
-getting some more sleep.

I'm down 9 pounds! Yay!

Monday, March 24, 2008

ta-da!

I'm officially starting Weight Watchers again, thanks to some generous help from my parents. I'll try to do the WW updates again as well. I really seriously need to lose weight so I can not have to worry about my blood pressure. I'm sure that's the culprit behind the nasty headaches I've been getting. I have a doctor who doesn't mind writing me prescriptions to knock the crap out of pain and tension, but I would rather not have to deal with it in the first place.

So here I am, starting the whole process once again. This time it's going to stick though. I know it will because going to the gym has gone well. My friend Kate has lost like sixty pounds and that is excellent motivation (I want to be as hot as her!) and also a good source of encouragement and advice. My boyfriend needs a little help changing some habits to be healthier and I can show him that it's not actually a drag to eat healthy foods more than you eat not so healthy foods. And I have an appointment with my cardiologist in June that I HAVE to have shown some improvement at so I don't have to go and keep sitting in the lobby with a bunch of old people waiting to see the cardiologist.

My first goal is to lose 10 pounds in the first four weeks of resigning up. I think I can do it if I really stay on top of things. I will let you know how it goes!

sometimes finding the truth is easier than facing it

That's the tag line for the movie In the Valley of Elah. K and I watched it today and I was fairly blown away. I didn't know much about it and wasn't really interested in seeing it, but K's stepmom picked it for everyone to watch today and I have to say, I'm glad she did. It's a war movie, but not in the typical sense. It's an after coming back from fighting in the war movie. It's disturbing because the film highlights how being in Iraq can change people and make them do things they never would have before and think about things in ways that would have been previously unacceptable but doesn't even hint at a way to address it or fix it or anything at all. I'd put this movie in the same category with The Kingdom and Lions for Lambs in that it makes you stop and think and then want to sit and cry because we are in so deep into a problem that spans so many facets that fixing it seems impossible. If I had a flag, I would be tempted to start flying it upside down myself.

Monday, March 17, 2008

boring but so lovely to me anyway

This weekend was great! Friday night after finally getting to leave work, Nurse Heather and I got some chips and queso coupled with margaritas. Then I met up with K and we got to catch up about our weeks and stuff. Saturday I never even took a shower. I was a complete bum! Sunday (which is still kind of today since I haven't gone to bed yet) was some more lounging and a meal at IHOP and some shopping at Target with K. He helped me clean up my apartment a little bit. I had a vision of really hardcore cleaning it which we didn't really do, but doing all the laundry and folding it AND putting it away and doing most of the dishes and putting THEM away really made a difference in how I feel about my place and all. I bought a nifty duster thing and cleaned my ceiling fans and cleaned out my fridge. K and I ordered pizza and watched Ninja Warrior and it was all just great. Super non-exciting but I feel refreshed. Actually I'm still a little tired but thankfully the headache I had literally all day on Friday went away and hasn't returned.

So right now I'm going to get another glass of water and go to bed and watch Roseanne until I fall asleep. I'm turning off my phone ringer and sleeping heartily.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

...

It is Wednesday night and I am EXHAUSTED. I have TWO more days to go before the weekend!

Thursday, February 21, 2008

i'm all sweaty and it feels great

I didn't sleep the best last night. Work has been very stressful. I have missed out on a few things I really wanted to attend because of work which sucks because it has been so stressful there. I just started a new class and this one is a lot harder than my last one so I need to set aside more time at home to work on it. I'm stressed.

Tonight I went to the gym and I did 50 minutes on the elliptical trainer on the cross training setting so the intensities went up and down and whatnot. I tried to keep my heart rate around 130 for fat burning and I was right around there the whole time. So I was working hard enough to accomplish things but not so hard that I was going to pass out any second.

I'm home now and all sweaty and I'm definitely tired but I'm happy. And accomplished. This is week three of working out regularly and it's going great! I want to be more deliberate about my routines (um, maybe HAVING a routine is a good place to start) in March, but I think just going and pushing myself has made it a good start on this whole path.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

wednesday wonders: the why can't I just fall asleep already version

Happy happy things...

...a really great Valentine's Day with K. The holiday itself is not a big deal to me but getting to celebrate being in love with K with him was pretty fantastic.
...sweettart conversation hearts
...as i am by alicia keys. Need something new to listen to at the gym? Go to this gal. Even the mellower stuff kicks ass with its beats and simply incredible arrangements and lyrics. LOVE HER.
...vitamin water. Revive is still my favorite but i tried this other one recently that was pretty great but i can't remember the name of it.
...clocking out at the end of the day without having torn any hair out despite several visions of doing so through the day.
...making plans on the weekend.
...doing a really wuss weight workout but feeling it (without being sore) the next day.
...loving the gym as much as I do these days
...working out after a tediously stressful day
...skipping working out to come home to a vase full of flowers and some dinner courtesy of my boyfriend.
...the sound of my iBook keyboard. truth be told i need a new laptop that has more memory and an unjacked hinged, but this little blossom has done me well
...talking politics without sounding like an idiot
...talking about the future with K without feeling dumb
...vodka and club soda with a few lime wedges
...a very colorful calendar of events hanging by my front door
...K's enthusiasm about the knight rider movie that was on sunday night. I didn't watch that show growing up but believe me, I am thoroughly filled in on what it was like
...starting a psychology class online. oh hello again my true academic love
...being in school and knowing that though it might not seem like i've risen to my full potential to the random outsider, at least i'm in the works of getting to a college degree
...emails
...surprise packages in the mail.
...planning to mail surprise packages to other people (even if I'm retarded and may or may not actually get it done anytime in the near future)
...taking lunch breaks that consist of sitting in my truck and writing in my journal
...blt sandwiches with no mayo at jim's
...looking for a new apartment and finding a great many to choose from that are slightly bigger AND cheaper AND closer to work
...the confidence that comes with deciding to work out three times a week and sticking to it for three weeks in a row
...not having gained any weight this month even if it doesn't look like i'm going to make my ten pound loss goal
...eye cream. whether or not i need it and whether or not it has made a disernible difference, it feels lovely and smells great when i put it on as i'm getting ready for my day
...beating people at foosball after it having been YEARS since the last time i played
...making a list while using questionable capitalization skills