Sunday, December 28, 2008

my every year end of the year recap survey

what did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
-- Had a boy as a roommate. Gave two weeks notice with absolutely no regret or feeling of guilt. Hosted a Mary Kay party.

did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
-- I didn't make any. I will for this year but I will write a post about that later.

anyone close to you give birth?
-- My cousin had a baby! I know of three births that will happen in 2009 so far too.

did anyone close to you die?
-- Nope.

what countries did you visit?
-- None.

what would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
-- More days that I care about what I look like than not.

what date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
-- No really specific dates. Just some events here and there that were either fun or thought-provoking.

what was your biggest achievement of the year?
-- Realizing that I have found irrational and inconvienent love and that it will only grow from here on out.

what was your biggest failure?
-- My efforts at taking care of my health and fitness. The better way to put it is my complete lack of effort at doing so.

did you suffer illness or injury?
-- I have realized that about the middle of November to the middle of January mean one giant sinus headache at the very least. I am allergic to something in San Antonio air that knocks me down hard and then keeps kicking me in the shin for six weeks after the initial blow. It's awesome. If by awesome you mean suck-tastic.

what was the best thing you bought?
-- I like my new apartment. I got a new bed as a gift and that has been pretty lovely.

whose behavior merited celebration?
-- My sister is pregnant! My cousin had a baby! Kate moved back to San Antonio!

whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
-- Whoever it was at work that decided to push me out of my job. I don't know who or why and quite honestly neither fact would make me feel better. I am just glad I have one more real shift to work there and then I'm done.

where did most of your money go?
-- Rent, bills, the usual boring things that suck it all up.

what did you get really, really, really excited about?
-- Registering for classes.

what song will always remind you of 2008?
-- Big Blue Sea by Bob Schnieder. That's me and K's song, officially.

compared to this time last year, are you
i. happier or sadder? -- happier
ii. thinner or fatter? -- about the same i guess
iii. richer or poorer? -- about the same

what do you wish you'd done more of?
-- Taken time to just sit and breathe.

what do you wish you'd done less of?
--Procrastination

how will you be spending Christmas?
-- Christmas Eve, Kiris and I went to my parent's house and spent the evening with them and my sister and her family. Christmas Day we went to K's mom's house. Both times were definitely good times.

did you fall in love in 2008?
-- Just more in love with K.

how many one-night stands?
-- None. Not my style, plus I'm very happily attached.

what was your favorite TV program?
-- Life. The Office. Grey's Anatomy. CSI: Miami on A&E and Criminal Minds on A&E.

do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
-- Nope

what was the best book you read?
-- Eat Pray Love

what was your greatest musical discovery?
-- Bob Schneider

what did you want and get?
-- A swift kick in the ass to get me back into school in a full-time capacity.

what was your favorite film of this year?
-- The Dark Knight

what did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
-- I slept in... K took me out for Japanese food at my favorite restaurant. I met a bunch of friends at a bar. I turned 28 and it was a good time.

what one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
--More confidence in my decisions.

how would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
-- Ugh. None.

what kept you sane?
-- Getting to come home to a loving boyfriend. Allergy medicine.

which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
-- I have a crush on the character of Charlie Crews from Life.

what political issue stirred you the most?
-- The presidential election and the subsequent cabinet choices. I am seriously stoked for the U.S.! Maybe we'll have respect from the world again...

who did you miss?
-- I don't know. I kind of missed myself. Towards the end of the year especially, I've kind of felt like a shell of myself.

who was the best new person you met?
-- Heather. And I don't remember exactly when I met Kristen but we definitely firmed up our relationship this year.

tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008:
-- Everything happens for a reason, even if it takes you a year to realize how the events lined up just right for something cool to happen.

quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
-- And its days like this that burn me
Turn me inside out and learn me
Not to tell you anything I think I know
Well I think I'll tell you all that I know
I don't want to be alone I want to be a stone
I wanna sink to the bottom of the ocean
And lie there laugh there with you laugh
Yhere with you til I'm gone

At the bottom of the big blue sea
Just you and me At the bottom of the big blue sea

Saturday, December 13, 2008

strange things are afoot at the circle k

Not really. But I am on the cusp of some very huge changes and I have to say that the more I talk about them, the more excited I feel. I have to get through this month with my sanity intact and then I will spill all of the gory details. Or close to all of them.

But I can say this in the meantime. One of the most exciting parts of my huge undertaking starts tomorrow morning. I'm going to one of the five thousand colleges in San Antonio and sitting down with a counselor and hashing some details out. I am returning to school full-time in January. I will be finishing my Bachelor's in Psychology and probably adding a minor in something along the lines of government or history to help with the residency requirements (you have to take so many units at a school to earn a diploma there). I will also get a teaching certification and hopefully teach while pursuing a Masters in probably something along the lines of Psychology or Counseling. I am VERY excited about this. It is going to be crazy hard and take some serious time and effort but I truly believe it will all be worth it.

It is so lovely to look at a potentially awful situation and see an amazing opportunity and pounce on it before you have time to sink.

Also, I got my first weight loss star this week! I have lost a total of 6.4 pounds. Lots more to go, but not that many more until my jeans will fit better and not much more than that for others to be able to see that I'm becoming fit and fabulous.

Maybe December doesn't have to be a month of suck in my life after all!

Saturday, December 6, 2008

...

Sick of being sick, that's me. I still don't feel good. I have more of my voice back which is good. Last night K and I went out to dinner and I think that's what wiped me out for most of today. How pathetic is that?! Making it more ridiculous is we had Japanese food so I fully took advantage of the hot green tea offering and had a giant bowl of udon which hit the spot. I can't believe how long it's been since I had a good bowl of udon...

K and I were supposed to go to a friend's fish fry tonight. I actually really wanted to go. I spent most of the day in bed and then took a shower and realized there was no way it was going to work. So K is over there and I'm at home grumpily watching tv. It's totally fine and probably good that he is over there because I am definitely a huge grump.

I think I'm going to just tuck myself into bed and watch some SNL.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

december

So this is what I was thinking about because I was laying in bed feeling miserable and couldn't think of anything happy to think about. I hate December.

It truly used to be my favorite month and I worked in a mall for a lot of years so that should really qualify that statement. Even in California people just get a little nicer to strangers. They hold doors open, there's more smiles, there's twinkle lights EVERYWHERE, and Christmas music is simply fantastic. Then there is plenty of family time and good food and surprises seemingly around every corner.

But let's take a look at my last few Decembers.

2008
One week a sinus and ear infection. One week off. Another week of the allergies from hell. A shot in the doctor's office, two pills in the morning, one nasal spray once in the morning, another nasal spray two other times during the day, and another set of pills that is a little confusing but is helping clear the fluid in my ears so I'm alright with it. I sound like a frog lives in my throat, I am coughing from my toes, and sneezing like a mofo.

2007
Two weeks of misery that was also allergy induced. I just didn't know any better and waited a few days before going to the doctor. It was right before Christmas and I barely had the energy to do anything at all Christmas-y. And I was broke from not working.

2006
It wasn't entirely bad, just weird. I went to California with my mom at the beginning because my grandmother was having surgery and no one knew how well she was going to do with the operation and the recovery. My mom ended up not coming back home for several months. Christmas was a little stranger than normal because everyone was in California for my cousin's wedding except me. I did make sugar cookies with K and he had never rolled out dough and done sprinkles before and that was kind of awesome.

2005
My dad and I drove all of my earthly belongings from Riverside to San Antonio. It took exactly the same amount of time to get from Riverside to the border of Texas as it did to get from the border of Texas to San Antonio. It's a big freaking state. It was a very tumultuous time for me, deciding to move and figuring out a way to make it happen. Or really convince my parents to help me make it happen because they financed the whole operation and let me move in with them with no restrictions. I made the decision quickly and said a lot of sad good-byes and moved with no idea how it would turn out. Being a full-time auntie and having a fantastic boyfriend have worked out pretty well though.

I guess that's about it. I am just grumpy and frustrated because I am so incredibly tired but I cannot get comfortable enough to actually fall asleep. There's too much air blowing on my face but turning the fan down means my legs start sweating again. I need to lie down to sleep but then I can feel my pulse in my sinuses. So I'm blogging and watching old sitcoms. TV Land and Nick at Nite are fantastic in my book.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

allergies

I recently read that more people die in Southern California annually because of air pollution related causes than car crashes. If you've ever driven on any Southern California freeway, you know what a remarkable statement this is. I never had any problems. I started drinking bottled or filtered water, or at least putting lemon in water after I moved to Riverside because the water tasted funky, but that was really the only environmentally charged change I made.

Now, however, I live in San Antonio. On the daily weather forecasts, they also include mold, pollen, and mountain cedar air counts. I don't know exactly what they mean except that a lot of people in San Antonio have allergies. I personally have allergies like a mofo. No really, I think I saw my doctor right that in my chart today. Day one, I have itchy eyes, the sniffles, and maybe a minor sore throat or headache. Most everything goes away with some Tylenol or something similar. From what I've seen, this is what most people in San Antonio mean when they say they have allergies. That is the set of symptoms they have during a particular season. Not me, my friends.

Day two, my ears are so full of random crap that it feels like I'm in a swimming pool. And everything is very very loud to me even though I know it's all really just normal volume. I have snot just dripping wantonly out of my nose and my throat is on fire. I have a cough that disturbs young children. Any energy I have is simply sucked right out of me when I do something like take a shower or walk from the bed to the kitchen to get some juice. My sinuses are so full that the pressure starts to make me believe that if I can just poke something through my cheeks it will go away. My sneezes sound and feel as if they originated in my toes. My nose is red and raw. And anyone who sees me, including medical professionals, give me looks of sympathy before I even open my mouth to say anything at all.

Last year I waited a few days to go to the doctor and ended up with two shots in my bum, a bag of prescription samples, and a handful of slips to turn in to a pharmacy. So this year when I felt all cruddy two weeks ago, I went to the doctor. It turned out I had a sinus infection and two ear infections. Good thing I only have two ears! I took three doses of antibiotics a day for ten days. I felt better on day seven and finished the pills because YOU ALWAYS FINISH ANTIBIOTICS. Then my throat got sore again. That was on Sunday. Monday, I had an obnoxiously runny nose at work and the beginning of a cough. I took every decongestant and antihistamine I could get my hands on and didn't really get any relief.

A quasi side note to my story is that one benefit of working with nurses is they often have awesome suggestions on tricks for feeling better or at least getting through your day. Last night, a nurse told me to squirt saline solution up each nostril and let it run out. My dear friend Kate, aka Splenda, uses a netti (neti?) pot every day so this wasn't a completely foreign idea, but I have never done anything like that before. Let me tell you, I could actually breathe again! The nurse's suggestion was to do it once an hour and she stocked me up on supplies. Oh, needless syringes, how I love thee...

Last night when I got home I was going to take a very hot shower and go to bed. There was no hot water so I just went to bed. I slept for a few hours and then woke up even snottier and also a little disorientated. My nose was killing me and I realized there was just no way to go into work and not get fired for yelling at someone or something like that. I claimed the futon and propped up pillows and slept a little bit. This morning I called and asked for any appointment today.

It's allergies. They just knock me down. I got a shot in my hip, which is really a shot in your butt so I don't know exactly why they say that. I got a bag that has about 10 days worth of allergy medicine samples and yet another handful of prescription slips to take into a pharmacy probably next pay day. I was also told that if I don't show signs of improvement very soon, I will need to see an allergist.

I already had a handful of pills to take every morning and now I've got two more to add to the mix. And two nose sprays. Most of the pills can probably be eliminated by losing weight and exercising, which I am doing, but the allergy stuff will probably have a home in my medicine cabinet as long as I live in San Antonio. Today I am considering making a list of other places to move to because holy crap I am miserable.

Say you feel really sorry for me and you live in the area. Feel free to express your empathy with orange juice (well, really any kind of juice), the kind of tissue with lotion in it, cough drops, or a few bottles of water. I'm staying home tomorrow and then will play the rest of the week by ear.

I'm going to take a shower now because I heard a rumor that the hot water is back on. I heart steam.