Wednesday, June 30, 2010

humpday happiness!

Just in under the wire!

A list of things making me happy...

...S's giggles! I am not particularly successful at earning them but they are a delight to listen to when the grandparents bring them out!
...the sound system in my car.
...being able to comfort my son. husband busting his hump to take care of our family.
...nasal rinses.
...sparkling water, now and forevermore Mary Kay catalogs in my hot little hands!
...text messages
...reading blogs on my phone
...hanging out with my sister and our babies
...hurricane season as experienced in San Antonio
...the sound of cicadas
...tweaking Facebook privacy controls
...playing with Twitter wedding band is getting looser
...I've lost a total of 54 pounds since March
...nursing my baby, even if it does mean no cheese tea lemonade from the Bux eyeglasses! contacts!
...strong fingernails
...having good songs stuck in my head showers

Friday, June 25, 2010

seven quick takes

1. Never have I known the pleasure of a hot shower like I do now, as a mother of a small child. For whatever reason, spit up doesn't really gross me out, I can handle being peed on (it's usually my fault for bad diaper placement anyway), I get extra sweaty lugging the baby carrier around, and generally get pretty gross by the end of the day. But it's really only after getting S fed and asleep that I have the opportunity to take a shower. And sometimes there's just too many other loose ends to tie up for the day for me to feel alright about taking a shower. But when I do get in there and let the hot water just pound on my head for a few minutes, it's heavenly. Eventually I'll get back to shaving my legs, doing a round of body wash, and exfoliating my face all in one shower. For now it's maybe one of those in addition to the standard shampoo and soap. I start thinking I can hear S crying and even if someone else is on the listen-out for that, it takes away some of the fun of enjoying that shower. But seriously. Best shower of my life was the first one after delivering him and now it's something that brings me a lot more joy than it used to.

2. I want to lose ten more pounds before my doctor appointment at the end of next month. I know that if I really bust my ass, I can do it. The problem I guess is how to do that exactly. Every time I nurse S, I get hungry. I have been trying to figure out when I can work out a little bit but get stuck because I can come up with a work out time and come up with a shower time, but there is a lot of stuff that happens inbetween and I don't know if I'm okay with that. I might be... But I don't know. I need to figure this out though because after that ten pounds is another 90 to go.

3. I hope K and I have all boys. If we have a girl, I won't be disappointed, but I'm just saying. I never thought I'd think anything like that. And I may change my mind depending on how many bugs I fish out of S's pockets when he gets older and I'm doing laundry.

4. My sister and her family are moving and it makes me really sad. I haven't mentioned it much because I don't really want to talk about it exactly. I don't completely understand their reasoning but I hope it goes well for them and they are happier. But I will miss her terribly. We are finally, actually, real friends. Not awful to each other, not tolerating each other, but genuine friends. And now she's leaving.

5. Which brings me to my next brief thought... I really need some more friends in San Antonio. I need more friends who are moms and can just relate to the spit up and baby clothes debates and formula vs breast feeding and wondering if you can possible continue taking this many pictures forever and does it make you not as great of a mom if you can't. I need more women to talk to about family and sleep deprivation. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated. :)

6. I don't have the attention span I used to. I thought it would slowly come back, but so far not so much. It drives K crazy. I can't sit and watch a movie with him. I either need a break in the middle of it to do something else, or I have to just be doing something else pretty much the whole time the movie is on. Weird.

7. I miss my truck a little bit because it's the vehicle I'd driven the longest, but I have to say having a car rocks. The stroller is in the trunk which is so handy, and it's nice that I can offer to give people rides again. Except the driver's seat doesn't adjust so someone with short legs would need to sit directly behind me. Or maybe we can move the baby's seat over...

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

tick tock

me: S likes music, but only the fast stuff. 96.1 is better than KLOVE right now.

my sis: That's funny. Most babies like the slow stuff.

me: I know, right? Slow stuff makes him cry. It has to be fast. Except Ke$ha makes him cry.

my sis: Yeah, I have the same reaction.

humpday happiness!

Here's a list of things from the recent days making me happy...

...dinner with my hubby tonight!
...a chance to connect with K while we were BOTH awake, lucid, and full of things to share with each other
...dove chocolates with peanut butter
...the faint scent of milk, baby lotion, and contentment in the air when I go to sleep at night.
...a baby with a gorgeous smile
...setting goals that are daunting but still realistic
...making future plans with K parents celebrating 31 years of marriage today!
...making pizzas with the munchkins the other day. Who knew they both loved pineapple that much!
...strangers telling me S is cute when we are out and about amazingly comfortable bed and pillows
...sparkling water. Forevermore, my friends. Forevermore.
...having a car instead of a truck (even though I miss the truck a little)
...genuinely liking my family
...homecooked Mexican food at my mother-in-law's house
...S's one tiny little birth mark on his shoulder burps
...watching The O.C. again
...feeling hopeful about things to come rather then just stuck where I am
...all the babies in our family! My cousin just added another one on Friday!
...the way my baby niece and my son connect without words
...getting to borrow my sister's rug shampooer and attacking the cars tomorrow
...being acclimated to Texas weather and thinking 80 degree evenings are nice
...text messages
...playing Words With Friends
...feeling like I just may be able to handle starting to read actual grown up books again soon parents adoring my son so much
...jeans getting too big!

don't stop thinkin about tomorrow

I have three personal goals I want to work on inbetween diaper changes and feedings. I think two of them require a daily effort and the third requires at least a weekly effort.

1. I want to lose 100 pounds by this time next year. This is not an impossible task and allows me to go at a healthy rate of 1-2 pounds a week. But it is not an easy task for me to lose weight. In the past, I have lost thirty or so pounds easily and then essentially given up and gained it all back. Since S was born, I've lost 53 pounds and haven't gained anything back. I have some weeks where I haven't lost anything but at least the scale is either holding steady or going down. In order to meet my goal, I need to exercise and keep an eye on what I eat. I think making a quick announcement on this blog or on Facebook each week will help keep me accountable. And if I hit a big plateau, I'm definitely going back to Weight Watchers. We are just trying to save as much money as possible so I'm trying to go as long as possible without paying for help in this particular endeavor.

2. I want to write at least 3 times a week in an effort to get back into the habit so I can start writing my book. If for nothing else, I would like to write a detailed account of my experience as a high risk mama and my hospital stay for S's birth. After I get going on it, really going, I'll research ways to see about getting it published. I think it'll be cathartic to write it all out and finish a big project I've just given myself and interesting to see about getting it published. It's been a goal for a very long time to have a book on the shelves of Barnes and Noble. If this book isn't it, at least I'll come away from the experience having a good idea how to make it happen at some point.

3. I want a solid Mary Kay business. I'm not sure about being a director just yet but I do think it can be a source of income for my family that allows me to mostly stay home with the baby. I placed an order tonight for catalogs and samples and I have an idea of who and how to send them out. If I put some weekly effort into this, for now at least, I think it could be a very good thing. If you're interested, you can check out my web site or email me anytime. I'm very non-pushy and I know a lot about the products because I genuinely like them.

That's all I've got for now!

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

newsletter: month 3

Dear Samson,

You've been three months old for two days now which means I'm a tiny bit behind. Being a mom is a busy job! You're currently napping, so I figure I've got just enough time to write you about this last month.

We were busy busy busy! A few things happened. I started to trust that you are mellow and flexible enough to handle more time out of the house. We've got feedings down and you are fantastically adaptable to nursing with a cover or having a bottle of breast milk or formula. Well, once I figured out that me cutting out dairy and switching you to soy formula was necessary to curb the projectile spit up incidents anyway. I figured out how to put the stroller in the cab of the truck in a way that got it in AND out easily so we could avoid worrying about sudden Texas rain storms and the stroller being in the bed of the truck. And I gained confidence in my ability to pack a well stocked diaper bag. You and I started spending more time out of the house here and there. We go grocery shopping, visit the library, and go see Daddy at work. Good times, good times. Even more exciting though is that you, me, and Daddy went to California! Before you were even three months old, you'd been on multiple flights. Pretty cool, if you ask me.

Grandma came with us too, and we all stayed at Grandmommie's house. You got to meet a LOT of family, go to In-N-Out with me and Daddy repeatedly, walked around in San Francisco all day, met some of my friends, and we even got to go to an almond factory (Grandmommie lives in the almond capital of the world). Mighty Samson is a mighty traveler! I think there were points were I was more fussy about having to get back in the car to go somewhere than you were. It was great fun getting to show you off to so many people and also getting to introduce Daddy to family in California.

You are growing and developing like crazy! You've rolled over on your own three times now and I think you're starting to see how to do it on purpose. You sleep in a crib now. If I hand you a stuffed animal, you will eventually get your arms around it to hug it. You like music, but only the fast stuff. And you smile like crazy. I think me and Daddy get the most smiles out of everyone, but you are generally pretty free with those gorgeous smiles. You've got a little squeal that sometimes accompanies the smile and I think it's kind of a giggle precursor. You coo and grunt and will respond to me talking to you with sounds that make me think you understand everything I'm telling you about. Everything is happening so fast! It's exciting and makes my heart just swell with love and pride. I can't even explain that properly. It's so cliche to say, but you'll understand someday when you're a parent.

Just before we went to California, you had a doctor's appointment that included some vaccinations. I think they are really important and I myself get vaccines when they are available to me. You did okay with the actual shots and didn't have any reactions afterwards but it was still a difficult appointment for me. You're so little and you don't know anything except for what we've shown you. When the nurse came in and got your legs ready for the shots, you just thought it was another nice lady who was going to smile at you and make a big deal about how adorable you are. She did, but she also gave you three shots. She got the first two in lightening fast because it took you a second to realize what was happening. You had such a startled look on your face before you started crying in pain and surprise that it hurt my heart a little bit. I think that's a big part of being a mom that no one can really prepare me for. I have to stand by or hold your hand while you get hurt because it's better for you in the long run.

Here's to future months, Samson. There's so much more to come! And hopefully my letters will get a little less sappy and a little more funny. You give me lots of fodder with your impressive farting and burping skills but I somehow get distracted by everything else when I sit down to write.

I love you. Thank you for causing my heart to grow bigger and bigger each month so it can continue to barely contain all the love I have for you.