Sweet Asher Baby,
It's been two months and I think
we are doing this family of four thing pretty well! You fit right in and
the three of us completely adore you. I have to remind myself that
although I'm comfortable being a mama to an itty bitty because I've done
it once before, you are not the same person that your brother is. Some
things will be the same, but a lot won't because you don't have the same
personalities. I want both of you to feel free to be yourselves and not
worry about what the other guy is doing. Right now that is hard
sometimes. Bed time is basically awful. I'm either holding you and
telling you that I have to put you down for a few minutes to take care
of your brother, or I'm holding him and saying the same thing. I know we
are all going to get better at this, but I'm hoping it's much sooner
rather than later!
you are much more alert now and I'm catching a better and better
picture of your personality. For example, you love being held tight and
snuggled for long periods of time but hate having a blanket on top of
you. You have an amazing smile and share it fairly freely, but save the
biggest ones for me and Daddy. You are kind of big for your age (almost
14 pounds this month!) and are strong and alert. You are cooing and
making all kinds of other sounds and will "talk" to me. You LOVE
baths--your whole little body calms down and after I get you dressed and
let you sit in your bouncy chair, you stretch out and just sleep.
month has been a big adventure of me taking you and your brother out
and about by myself. We kind of holed up in the house for the most part
to try to keep the flu at bay. I've had a tinge of worry since you were
born about you getting sick and I just wanted to keep that away from you
as long as possible. And so it begins... Mommy wanting to keep you nice
and safe and protected at home! But Daddy works a lot and we need
groceries, so out of the house we go. I'm still working out kinks and
will probably come up with an excellent routine just in time for things
to change again. You don't cry the WHOLE time anymore though, so at
am crazy about you, Asher. I'm so glad that I get to be yours and you
are mine. One of my biggest hopes is that above all else you know that
you are loved tremendously. By me, by Daddy, and by God. Looking towards
the future and thinking about how to teach you to respect everyone just
because they are fellow humans, how to be a productive member of
society, and to be a God seeker is super daunting at the moment. When
I'm in the midst of laundry and cooking and wrangling you and your
brother, sometimes the days go by so slowly I can hardly stand it. But
the weeks and months are flying by and I hope so hard that I don't miss
anything while I'm in the middle of doing everything.
smiles start in your eyes and then slowly spread across your whole face.
I hope that you approach life a little like that. Let new things start
small and then let them spread across your whole being as you go along.
No need to rush. No need to always meet other people's expectations. No
need to take on more than you can handle.