My mom referred to me as her velcro child for at least the first four years of my life because when she tried to drop me off anywhere, I would attach myself to her leg in an effort to not have to stay. I was painfully shy even after I gave up attaching myself to her and still spend a lot of my time around people being fairly quiet. I like to assess the situation before jumping in. I'm definitely an introvert and I can spend time in large groups, even speak in front of large audiences, and I enjoy getting to know new people but then I need some recovery time spent all by myself. As I've gotten older and added things to my life like a husband and a child, I've been able to shorten the time I need and sneak it in during things like slightly longer showers or by concentrating on cooking something fantastic or even losing myself in a song while driving.
I don't think my husband has ever met a stranger. He thrives on meeting new people, on spending time in crowds, and loves parties. Everywhere we go, it is almost certain someone will ask him if they know him from somewhere and they usually do. When we go to any kind of gathering together, I have to tell him at least 45 minutes before I really want to leave that it's time to get going because it takes that much time for him to go around and say by to everyone.
S is a fantastic combination of our looks and our personalities. He has some traits that are distinctly similar to me and just as many like K. And there are things that are kind of a combination. For example, the kid gets free stuff all the time. Even before he was born, he got clothes and baby gear (for which we are so incredibly thankful!). It is not uncommon in the least for people to give him stuff when we are out and about. That's why we have five thousand hot wheels. That is definitely like his daddy. He is pretty personable but doesn't immediately go to people he doesn't know well. That is definitely like me.
But all of the sudden, he is very shy and sometimes even hesitates to go immediately to any of his grandparents. Of everyone he knows, that's the set that he knows the most after me and K of course. He will clutch my arm or step behind my legs. He freaks out when we drop him off at church childcare. As much as I would love to find a baby-sitter we can call and have come over to watch S, I am now pretty scared to even try to start that process.
These days, I am just exhausted all the time. I am stressing over the state of my house and the baby's room. K and I came up with what I think is a decent plan today on getting the big stuff taken care of and then tackling the little stuff. I can't get anything done while S is awake because he's into everything trying to help me or just explore newfound treasures like inside of the closet. And when I get him down for a nap, I take one too because I am drained. He usually goes to bed before K comes home from work, but that's kind of a crap shoot lately too. I can focus on things long enough to make a grocery list or a to do list for the next day, but that's about it before I just crawl into bed too.
And this is why I am quietly freaking out about adding another baby to the mix. Tired now has nothing on a brand new newborn. I don't know how long S is going to be in this phase or if this is just how it is from here on out with him.
Just trying to take it a day at a time. And I am beyond grateful that my parents live nearby and can and will take S to their house for a few hours here and there and he has a great time!
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