S clearly knows something is up. He wants to sit in my lap all day long and at night he'll be quiet for a bit but then suddenly start yelling, "Mommy, where are you?!" I don't want to reward random yelling but I also don't ever want him to feel abandoned.
I am exhuasted.
We had one good night of bed time and sleep this week, and for that, I am grateful. But I am still tired right now. I was just daydreaming of the time when I could hold firmly to "time worked is time paid." Being a mom is the hardest job I've ever had and there is never a clock-out time. Or paycheck. I think when S gets a little older it'll be easier because it will be a more give and take relationship rather than me doing so much work with little feedback from him.
Potty training went super well today, which is awesome!
And that's all I've got.
Showing posts with label #31days. Show all posts
Showing posts with label #31days. Show all posts
Friday, October 5, 2012
the one where i write about 31 days, day #4
Okay, so day 4 was yesterday. And part of my getting my shtuff together was that I let other things be a priority over writing last night. I think that was a good decision.
My mom picked up S on her way home from work and took him home for a couple of hours. It was fairly glorious to have just a little bit of time to read and eat without chasing after anyone or sharing everything or being sat on in one way or another. I'm so grateful that my parents live nearby and love my family as much as they do. They don't shy from saying no if we ask them to watch S and they can't for whatever reason, but we are always free to ask.
I got a load of laundry going, I attempted to find a workbook I need for a Bible study locally and ended up just ordering it online, I downloaded a book to my Nook, I got some spicy Thai curry, I went to Target and got some potty training supplies, and I picked up my little guy.
I also discovered I'm old. When I was at Target, my total was $60.05 and I get the cashier $61. He hit the wrong button and was freaking out over not knowing how much change to give me. I said not to worry, I just needed .95. And he was super grateful I'm so good at math because he is not. I'm old because I shook my head to myself while thinking it just wasn't that hard to know how much change I needed.
I didn't cross anything off of my to-do list, but I also should have listed getting S potty trained by Nov (or at least do everything I can to make it happen by Nov) on there. I think I have everything I need now.
Day 4 of getting my sh*t together... Not too shabby. But the house is still a mess. :)
My mom picked up S on her way home from work and took him home for a couple of hours. It was fairly glorious to have just a little bit of time to read and eat without chasing after anyone or sharing everything or being sat on in one way or another. I'm so grateful that my parents live nearby and love my family as much as they do. They don't shy from saying no if we ask them to watch S and they can't for whatever reason, but we are always free to ask.
I got a load of laundry going, I attempted to find a workbook I need for a Bible study locally and ended up just ordering it online, I downloaded a book to my Nook, I got some spicy Thai curry, I went to Target and got some potty training supplies, and I picked up my little guy.
I also discovered I'm old. When I was at Target, my total was $60.05 and I get the cashier $61. He hit the wrong button and was freaking out over not knowing how much change to give me. I said not to worry, I just needed .95. And he was super grateful I'm so good at math because he is not. I'm old because I shook my head to myself while thinking it just wasn't that hard to know how much change I needed.
I didn't cross anything off of my to-do list, but I also should have listed getting S potty trained by Nov (or at least do everything I can to make it happen by Nov) on there. I think I have everything I need now.
Day 4 of getting my sh*t together... Not too shabby. But the house is still a mess. :)
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
the one where i talk about 31 days of getting my shit together #3
The biggest thing I did today was go grocery shopping, get a whole chicken, cook it, debone it, and start chicken stock that will cook overnight in the crockpot. It's not giant, but it's a decent accomplishment that I'm pretty excited about!
My method was super simple.
Rinse the chicken off
Stuff the cavity with lemon and parsley.
Cook in the crockpot on high for 4.5 hours.
Let chicken cool.
Debone as much as I had patience for tonight.
Dump the bones and skin right back in the crockpot.
Add celery, carrots, garlic, pepper, onion, salt, and water.
Cooking on low overnight.
Tomorrow I'll strain it and put it in containers. I'll freeze most of it and use some of it for something immediately so I can taste my handiwork!
Tomorrow I'll also be making chicken salad with the chicken. I'll add Greek yogurt, mayo, grapes, red onion, apples, salt, pepper, celery, and almonds. Maybe something more if I feel like it needs it. I don't know know, I"m really winging this one.
I picked up in S's room, I picked up a bit in the living room, I decided the clothes really need to be folded and put away, and I glanced longingly at the baby's room, wanting to dive in there and sort clothes and set up the crib and everything. It has to be cleared out first. Decidedly less fun.
Yesterday, I think my husband was a bit concerned about me. I don't know what's wrong. I feel tired and achy but I have a two year old doing his best to stage a sleep strike which seems to be affecting my energy level MUCH more than his. I miss baby-sitting. Last time I was pregnant I was fairly depressed while I was working and it started to lift once I wasn't anymore. This time, I'm in a funk after having had to stop working. But he took care of S so I could take a delicious nap and he ran some errands for me after we finally got S quiet for bed time.
I was so fiercely independent for so long that sometimes I fall back into that and forget that my husband and I are part of a team that does things together and for each other. I don't ask for help very much and I need to more. I need to open up a bit more to him. But I am thankful he knows me well enough to just jump in and take over sometimes. We've both gotten better. We both have a ways to go in being a 100% team 100% of the time. I think part of it is we were both on our own for several years before getting married. And part of it is personality and part of it is just straight up time availability.
You know what though? When I was in labor with S and my epidural stopped working and I knew something was wrong but couldn't string the words together to say, all I wanted was K standing next to me holding my hand. And he knew it and was there. He only let go to run to get a nurse and they did the c-section within ten minutes of that.
This is not the journey of 31 days that I had meant for it to be, but I am grateful for the reminder that my husband doesn't expect me to have all my shit together. He just expects me to let him help me figure it out and remember that he's there regardless anyway.
My method was super simple.
Rinse the chicken off
Stuff the cavity with lemon and parsley.
Cook in the crockpot on high for 4.5 hours.
Let chicken cool.
Debone as much as I had patience for tonight.
Dump the bones and skin right back in the crockpot.
Add celery, carrots, garlic, pepper, onion, salt, and water.
Cooking on low overnight.
Tomorrow I'll strain it and put it in containers. I'll freeze most of it and use some of it for something immediately so I can taste my handiwork!
Tomorrow I'll also be making chicken salad with the chicken. I'll add Greek yogurt, mayo, grapes, red onion, apples, salt, pepper, celery, and almonds. Maybe something more if I feel like it needs it. I don't know know, I"m really winging this one.
I picked up in S's room, I picked up a bit in the living room, I decided the clothes really need to be folded and put away, and I glanced longingly at the baby's room, wanting to dive in there and sort clothes and set up the crib and everything. It has to be cleared out first. Decidedly less fun.
Yesterday, I think my husband was a bit concerned about me. I don't know what's wrong. I feel tired and achy but I have a two year old doing his best to stage a sleep strike which seems to be affecting my energy level MUCH more than his. I miss baby-sitting. Last time I was pregnant I was fairly depressed while I was working and it started to lift once I wasn't anymore. This time, I'm in a funk after having had to stop working. But he took care of S so I could take a delicious nap and he ran some errands for me after we finally got S quiet for bed time.
I was so fiercely independent for so long that sometimes I fall back into that and forget that my husband and I are part of a team that does things together and for each other. I don't ask for help very much and I need to more. I need to open up a bit more to him. But I am thankful he knows me well enough to just jump in and take over sometimes. We've both gotten better. We both have a ways to go in being a 100% team 100% of the time. I think part of it is we were both on our own for several years before getting married. And part of it is personality and part of it is just straight up time availability.
You know what though? When I was in labor with S and my epidural stopped working and I knew something was wrong but couldn't string the words together to say, all I wanted was K standing next to me holding my hand. And he knew it and was there. He only let go to run to get a nurse and they did the c-section within ten minutes of that.
This is not the journey of 31 days that I had meant for it to be, but I am grateful for the reminder that my husband doesn't expect me to have all my shit together. He just expects me to let him help me figure it out and remember that he's there regardless anyway.
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
the one where i talk about 31 Days #2
Um, I didn't do anything today.
Mostly I just figured out the reason for my kind of funk this week so far is that I don't have anything to do. I do so much better when I have things built into my schedule that force me to plan out the day and get dressed and presentable at a decent point in the day. I know I'm a grown-up and should be able to do that on my own, but I am not very good at it.
I cleaned up the kitchen a tiny bit. I played with S a lot and we read a lot of books.
That's another thing. All of the sudden, my very busy two year old wants nothing more than to sit in my lap or otherwise drape himself on me all day long. I miss my cuddlebug a little bit, but I have gotten used to us being in the same room each doing something rather than me having to physically hold him all day. Also, he likes to sit in my lap and lean back which pushes the baby into me a bit more. I am confident the baby is fine. My stomach or something gets squished out in a different way to get out of the way of the baby and it's just generally uncomfortable. We'll get it sorted out soon enough. I think he senses the baby or that things are changing and just wants some extra Mommy time. It's weird to think that this time period of it being just me and my little guy is ending in a matter of months.
So, here's to tomorrow being a better and actually productive day!
Mostly I just figured out the reason for my kind of funk this week so far is that I don't have anything to do. I do so much better when I have things built into my schedule that force me to plan out the day and get dressed and presentable at a decent point in the day. I know I'm a grown-up and should be able to do that on my own, but I am not very good at it.
I cleaned up the kitchen a tiny bit. I played with S a lot and we read a lot of books.
That's another thing. All of the sudden, my very busy two year old wants nothing more than to sit in my lap or otherwise drape himself on me all day long. I miss my cuddlebug a little bit, but I have gotten used to us being in the same room each doing something rather than me having to physically hold him all day. Also, he likes to sit in my lap and lean back which pushes the baby into me a bit more. I am confident the baby is fine. My stomach or something gets squished out in a different way to get out of the way of the baby and it's just generally uncomfortable. We'll get it sorted out soon enough. I think he senses the baby or that things are changing and just wants some extra Mommy time. It's weird to think that this time period of it being just me and my little guy is ending in a matter of months.
So, here's to tomorrow being a better and actually productive day!
Monday, October 1, 2012
the one where i write about 31 days #1--making a big fat list
Okay. So today S and I literally stayed in our pajamas all day long. Because I am lazy and we didn't have any where to be. That's not a particularly great example of getting my shit together. But! I did make a to do list for the month of October.
...get rid of broken tv in the living room
...move futon to the living room
...clean out every closet
...clean out closet in the living room, pack everything up, and put S's toys in there
...put end tables in the garage
...reorganize kitchen cabinets
...reorganize pantry
...clean out fridge, including wiping everything down
...sterilize baby bottles and make a spot in the kitchen for them
...sort through baby toys to keep, give away, trade in/sell
...sort through baby clothes to keep, give away, trade in/sell
...clear off both dressers in our room
...empty out baby's room, clean, and set up for Baby C-2
...look at baby registries and add/take away as needed
...cancel cable or find it for much cheaper
...go through S's clothes and reorganize his dresser/closet
...reorganize bookshelves in the living room
...move bookshelf into the living room for just kid's books
...start reading to S every night at bed time instead of watching tv
...find out information about toddler story time at the library and go
...apply to Galen College of Nursing
...study for entrance exam
...clean out my car
...clean stroller and repair the handle
...clean out car seat and readjust
...write a ridiculous number of posts for In the Trenches, edit, and schedule them out
...spend time with various friends
...do prenatal yoga dvd a few times a week
...menu plan every week and include lunch leftovers as meals
So, we'll see how this goes!
...get rid of broken tv in the living room
...move futon to the living room
...clean out every closet
...clean out closet in the living room, pack everything up, and put S's toys in there
...put end tables in the garage
...reorganize kitchen cabinets
...reorganize pantry
...clean out fridge, including wiping everything down
...sterilize baby bottles and make a spot in the kitchen for them
...sort through baby toys to keep, give away, trade in/sell
...sort through baby clothes to keep, give away, trade in/sell
...clear off both dressers in our room
...empty out baby's room, clean, and set up for Baby C-2
...look at baby registries and add/take away as needed
...cancel cable or find it for much cheaper
...go through S's clothes and reorganize his dresser/closet
...reorganize bookshelves in the living room
...move bookshelf into the living room for just kid's books
...start reading to S every night at bed time instead of watching tv
...find out information about toddler story time at the library and go
...apply to Galen College of Nursing
...study for entrance exam
...clean out my car
...clean stroller and repair the handle
...clean out car seat and readjust
...write a ridiculous number of posts for In the Trenches, edit, and schedule them out
...spend time with various friends
...do prenatal yoga dvd a few times a week
...menu plan every week and include lunch leftovers as meals
So, we'll see how this goes!
Sunday, October 2, 2011
31 days of improvement: day 2
I have a crap ton of weight to loose and I want to be healthy. And hott but I figure that will come along with the losing weight and being healthy.
My husband thinks I'm beautiful and looks at me like I'm pretty all the time. And I don't even think I'm really horrible looking, just fat. And my kiddo is super fast and active and busily getting into anything and everything and I want to be able to keep up with him or even get out ahead of him better.
My church just started a running group and are hosting a Beautiful Feet 5K at the end of November. I know that right now, I can definitely walk a 5K in a decent amount of time. But, it seems like the perfect opportunity to have a work out goal with a deadline attached and if nothing else, I'll get a t-shirt out of it. The registration money is going towards supporting and serving the Strong Foundation, a shelter for homeless families, Casa Hogar Misericorida orphanage in Chihuahua, Liberia NOW, Children's Emergency Relief International, and military ministry.
Today was my first day of Couch-To-5K and I have to say I can definitely do this but holy moly am I out of shape. I have an app for my phone and each day is a 30 minute work-out of walking and running. Today was a five minute brisk walk to warm up and then running for 60 seconds and then walking for 90 seconds. I finished the whole thing. I can see how you can get hooked on running but I am not there yet. I figure this will get easier the more I do it and I really love the app. If I was just trying to do it myself, I would give up. I really am that lame sometimes!
But I have a borrowed jogging stroller and I hit a sale at Kohls with a gift card and got actual running shoes and they are even black and PINK! I wear a women's 11 and that was the largest size I saw in all the running shoes there yesterday. We don't have set plans on baby C-2, but I think I better start praying now that my feet don't get any bigger with that baby!
Tomorrow I will be working out again, but I don't know if it'll be C25K or not. They recommend that you just do that three days a week, so we'll see how I feel. But otherwise, I have some workout dvds that I am starting to like, so it'll be something!
My husband thinks I'm beautiful and looks at me like I'm pretty all the time. And I don't even think I'm really horrible looking, just fat. And my kiddo is super fast and active and busily getting into anything and everything and I want to be able to keep up with him or even get out ahead of him better.
My church just started a running group and are hosting a Beautiful Feet 5K at the end of November. I know that right now, I can definitely walk a 5K in a decent amount of time. But, it seems like the perfect opportunity to have a work out goal with a deadline attached and if nothing else, I'll get a t-shirt out of it. The registration money is going towards supporting and serving the Strong Foundation, a shelter for homeless families, Casa Hogar Misericorida orphanage in Chihuahua, Liberia NOW, Children's Emergency Relief International, and military ministry.
Today was my first day of Couch-To-5K and I have to say I can definitely do this but holy moly am I out of shape. I have an app for my phone and each day is a 30 minute work-out of walking and running. Today was a five minute brisk walk to warm up and then running for 60 seconds and then walking for 90 seconds. I finished the whole thing. I can see how you can get hooked on running but I am not there yet. I figure this will get easier the more I do it and I really love the app. If I was just trying to do it myself, I would give up. I really am that lame sometimes!
But I have a borrowed jogging stroller and I hit a sale at Kohls with a gift card and got actual running shoes and they are even black and PINK! I wear a women's 11 and that was the largest size I saw in all the running shoes there yesterday. We don't have set plans on baby C-2, but I think I better start praying now that my feet don't get any bigger with that baby!
Tomorrow I will be working out again, but I don't know if it'll be C25K or not. They recommend that you just do that three days a week, so we'll see how I feel. But otherwise, I have some workout dvds that I am starting to like, so it'll be something!
Saturday, October 1, 2011
31 days of improvement: day 1
I cleaned the hallway bathroom from top to bottom. It's really nice in there and it's also literally the only spot in the house that is clean from top to bottom. I will be working hard this week to make that not be the case, but in the meantime, I kind of want to just hang out in there.
S wants to help me or be involved or try to do things himself regardless of what I'm doing. I love it and I try to encourage it but when I'm cleaning and he throws a fit because I'm sweeping and won't hand over the broom it makes things difficult. Or if I'm folding clothes and putting them in piles on the couch, well, I just don't bother anymore. He runs up and in one smooth movement dumps everything off the couch.
I'm starting to feel like I'm just trying to survive each day rather than live it. And it's not entirely true, but I think it is when it comes to how my house looks. Hopefully I can keep making little steps and have a house that's more clean than not! In the meantime, I'm going to go stand in the bathroom for a minute.
S wants to help me or be involved or try to do things himself regardless of what I'm doing. I love it and I try to encourage it but when I'm cleaning and he throws a fit because I'm sweeping and won't hand over the broom it makes things difficult. Or if I'm folding clothes and putting them in piles on the couch, well, I just don't bother anymore. He runs up and in one smooth movement dumps everything off the couch.
I'm starting to feel like I'm just trying to survive each day rather than live it. And it's not entirely true, but I think it is when it comes to how my house looks. Hopefully I can keep making little steps and have a house that's more clean than not! In the meantime, I'm going to go stand in the bathroom for a minute.
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