Last night I was at my second job and I was so tired. I have horrendous circles under my eyes and I'm running out of makeup so I'm pretty much not even bothering to try to cover them up at this point. I don't know what happened to my hair but it was out of control. Not awesomely out of control, but just a frizzy mess even though it was in a ponytail which I think requires a special talent. All the parking spots by my store were taken so I had to park to the bank on the other side of the bank right next door because those are the only parking spots in the kind of nearby area that don't have "No Starbucks Parking" put on them (I don't know how serious the signs are, but I don't want to have to pay to get my truck back either). I had to go back to my truck twice on my way into the store because I kept forgetting things, and even after that I realized I left my markers and some other stuff that I actually needed back there anyway.
I had to work seven hours-ish, after my eight earlier and it took me an hour to get into the swing of things, but then I was pretty okay. I actually stayed later than I was scheduled to help out and was pretty stoked to finally get to crawl under my covers.
But this is what drives me crazy: We all think our situation is so much worse than everyone else around us. I had everyone beat in the "Complain about the amount of time inbetween leaving work and having to be back at work" round. By a lot actually. It made me feel a little better for a tiny bit to gain such expressive looks of sympathy from my coworkers, but that hasn't really stopped the yawning today at all.
I don't know that I'd win any other rounds of the Complain Game though, and for that I am grateful. The issues I'm dealing with this week all pretty much stem from a lack of sleep and that is a problem that can be dealt with kind of easily. Everything else is going really well, and I get my first paycheck from Starbucks this week. That little piece of paper (and of course depositing it) will help me out so much. I will have proof that I am actually doing this for a reason.
The point is this: I am having a rough time adjusting, but this is a choice I made for several reasons. Everything else is good and I am stoked that I have friends who have put up with the whining and encourage me and I am glad that I could see a situation that I could turn around by making some changes and had the opportunity to just do it. Life doesn't always work that way.
Oh, and after Friday I'll probably be able to go buy some more makeup and at least have the option of not looking like death warmed over every day. And I need to work on smiling more and not whining so much. I'm starting to annoy myself actually.
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
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