Friday, February 8, 2008

friday five

Five reasons why I like going to the gym.

1. I get to wear my workout pants. I have two pairs that are that mesh-like material that are super comfortable. One is black and one is red.
2. My dad fixed my iPod and I can listen to long lost favorites again.
3. There's cardio machines with tv screens in them and most nights I can make it just in time to watch Friends. I heart Friends.
4. I like feeling all my muscles working and getting all sweaty. It's gross and awesome all at the same time.
5. I have already noticed a difference in my body. It'll be awhile before anyone else will be able to see anything but I feel good. So yay!

a little bit of rambling because it's been awhile

I got a raise and I got told all the ways I do not meet expectations in my job on the same day. It was a good conversation but it was difficult because I thought I was doing pretty well. Also, it's been ridiculously awful at work for the past two weeks and I haven't ever gotten so much satisfaction and relief out of clocking out every day in my life. It has been stressful and hard for everyone, not just me.

But going to the gym after work is truly fantastic. I get to sweat out some of the roughness of the day. And then because K's house is kind of on the way home, I've been stopping by and hanging out with him a little bit. It makes some late nights, but they are so nice that it makes it worth it. I'm still actually getting enough sleep most of the time as well.

I'm going to bed pretty soon and when I wake up I'll be getting ready to go to work on Friday. That means no matter how difficult the day is, I get to have two whole days off in a row. Praise Jesus for days off.

Thursday, February 7, 2008

instead of a wednesday wonder list, it's a thankful thursday list

A list of things that have made me happy recently:

...picking out something for K for Valentine's Day. I love all the stuff, it's so over the top and cheesy that it's fantastic! I'd rather make a big deal out of our anniversary than Valentine's Day, but all the hearts and pinks are so much fun that it's hard to resist.
...going to the gym after work and sweating out frustration about being yelled at when as a secretary there is so very little under my control or influence.
...feeling better about my appearance in general.
...having breakfast with Kate and Heather last weekend because it was delightful and I enjoy the two of them very much.
...buying stuff to take better care of my face. Hopefully I can buy some more makeup soon because I kind of miss it.
...magazines.
...the other night with K when we got some drinks and then came back to my place. I didn't get nearly enough sleep but it was worth it to have had such a fantastic time with him for no reason at all other than it was Tuesday.
...hanging out with my family on Sunday.
...the weather being colder again. I love snuggling down into my bed with all the covers.
...my new "gym bag" that cost a dollar.
...getting a whole new phone at work. It's the little things, it really is.
...getting sucked back into Lost.
...clocking out. There's a lot of satisfaction in the swiping of my ID badge at the end of the day these days, let me tell you.
...politics.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

i've been awake a very long time today

Just wanted to say that today I had a doctor's appointment and my blood pressure was so fantastic that now I only have to take one kind of blood pressure medicine! And it's the really cheap one! Also, I've lost two more pounds so that brings it to 13 since November. I gained a few over the holidays but dropped it again, so I'm really aiming for losing ten pounds this month. I can totally do it.

I got to meet K for lunch at Subway, yay for us both eating a healthy meal and yay for it being together!

Work was alright. But I brought my workout clothes inside with me and changed before I left and drove to the gym. I spent 35 minutes on the elliptical trainer and then left. I want to do weights, but there were more people by the weights and I don't really know what I'm doing yet so baby steps.

K was still up so I grabbed us some food (salad for me, yay!) and drove to his house and we chatted and watched some Travel channel and now I'm home.

And you know what is at home? A clean kitchen! And a clean bathroom! I will take care of the mountain of clean clothes in the laundry nook tomorrow. :)

Monday, January 28, 2008

movie review monday: cloverfield

I kind of want to summarize this one myself instead of looking for a summary to cut and paste into here. First of all you should just know that you will either love this movie or hate it. There is no inbetween and that's exactly what it felt like in the theater as I watched it.

Cloverfield is portrayed as a video tape that is part of a secret government file that was found in what was formerly known as Central Park. The tape was in a video camera that belonged to a 20 somethingish guy who was leaving for a new job opportunity in Japan the next day and his friends decided to throw him a surprise going away party and tape the whole thing for him as a going away present. During the party there is what they think is an earthquake but when everyone runs up to the roof of the building, they see a lot of strange things happening. As the movie unfolds, you discover some sort of giant monster is attacking Manhattan. Everyone is trying to get out of the city and to someplace safe. Because it is such an insane night, they decide to keep videotaping to be able to try to make sense of it all later.

So first of all, the picture is jumpy and shaky and unpredictable because it's filmed from a hand held video camera and the person doing the filming doesn't even own that particular camera. There's a lot of running and screaming and whatnot which sometimes in the best of movie circumstances is annoying and at time in this flim almost intolerable. I have to say that this kind of stuff usually really gets to me and I didn't have any problems during Cloverfield.

Second of all, this movie is a glimpse into the lives of a few people during a crazy event. There is a small amount of set up for some of the characters that explains a little of who they are, but it's not like a typical story that spends a lot of time at the beginning laying out why you should care about each character. The whole movie is just a section of events. There's no explanation for the monster or even what it really is even though you do get to see it a few times. The ending is unsatisfying as far as plot lines go. There are some parts that are a little unbelievable even in the middle of the whole supposition of events anyway, but I'm willing to forgive them because with adrenaline I guess they are techincally possible.

In any case though, I loved it. It was scary because it was tense. I kind of knew what was going to happen at the end from the beginning and I don't even think it's a plot spoiler to say that at all. To me it was pretty common sense. At first I was disappointed that we got to see the monster because I thought it might have been scarier if you didn't really know what was going on, but then I realized just because I saw the monster didn't mean I had any clearer understanding of what was happening than the characters did. There were a lot of twists and turns as they worked on getting out of Manhattan and I was on the edge of my seat pretty much for the whole movie. There was a little gore, but it wasn't overpowering and it was definitely appropriate to the plot. I can appreciate that kind of gore.

With all the buzz leading up to it, with the mixed reviews from critics and moviegoers, and the amount of money this movie has made, it will be interesting to see if we get a chance to see that monster again. It's hard to say. I'm a big fan of just leaving well enough alone, but then again, there's a lot of angles they could choose to explore that could be kind of cool. I'm hestitant to get too excited about the possibility of a sequel or what have you because I was super stoked about there being more Matrix movies and we all know how well that turned out.

I'd love for more people I know to go see it and tell me what they think. K and I loved it, but we were definitely part of a small group in the packed theater that felt that way. Thank you J.J. Abrams for not catering to the lowest common denominator. Again.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

just thinking about january almost being over

I didn't make a specific list of new year's resolutions at the beginning of the year because I made a list of goals for the year on my birthday that I basically haven't even touched. I decided to be a little more general and just say I need to take better care of myself.

As I've gone through this month (or as it's basically flown by at a rather scary and rapid rate) I've decided to work on some specific stuff in February.

-I need to spend less money on food at work and also eat more healthy items. This can be accomplished fairly easily. I think what I need to do is go to the grocery store every couple of days. A few times lately I have gotten all inspired and bought ingredients for recipes and then never acutally made the dishes and thrown everything away and just eaten at McDonald's while at work. I still have some frozen dinners right now so tonight I went to the store and got some snack kind of things to have at work. I'm off to a good start!
-I need to work on better stress management. I think something that might work is to go to the gym after work. Doing 30-45 minutes of cardio and then lifting some light weights at least three times a week is going to be my initial goal. Then I'll shower when I get home and this might help me to not get sick so often. The working out AND the showering at night and washing off all the work germs might be double duty for that aspect.
-I need to keep my apartment cleaner and homier. I don't really know what happened here. But as I've been thinking about what I want to look for in a new (cheaper) apartment, I've realized the biggest thing I want is a place that I feel comfortable inviting people over at whim. The only thing keeping me from doing that now is the fact that I am just lazy about cleaning these days. There's no reason to leave dishes in the sink for a few days or wash clothes and leave all the clean clothes in laundry baskets for a week. I'm busy, but not THAT busy. And if I find that my apartment is clean and comfortable and homey and I still don't have anyone over but K, well, that can be another goal. :)

So that's where I'm at. How are you doing on your goals and whatnot?

this is disgusting but i feel compelled to share

Well on Friday I was digustingly sick. It was pretty much a 24 hour bug with some small remnants hanging on that I expect to be done with by the end of today.

I was supposed to work another double which is exciting because I need some cash and that is a kickass way to get it. I work in my own unit where I know everyone and the dynamic and it's only four hours earlier than I used to go in every Friday after class. Last week I took a lunch break during the first half of the shift and again in the second half of the shift and the only difficult part was the last hour and a half because everything was so calm. So when I woke up on Friday and my stomach felt all weird I chalked it up to not really getting enough sleep but figuring it'd be fine after a little bit and maybe some breakfast and went to work.

The first thing that I noticed was I was sweating. Who sweats inside after being outside where it was 38 degrees and nothing is going on and it's 6:30 in the morning? I got some iced water and eventually snagged the little fan and aimed it right at my head. And then I made my first trip to the bathroom. After I came back, the charge nurse asked me to go find some more history forms for the patients because we were running low. She had no idea where it was I could find them so I kind of took advantage of that and wandered around a bit honestly trying to find some in various departments but also using several different bathrooms in several different areas of the hospital. I couldn't find any of those forms anywhere anyway (it might just be because we're the only department that uses them, but I don't know) and went back to my computer. Then made another trip to the bathroom.

I was splashing some water on my face and drying it off and realized I looked AWFUL. Pale with sunken eyes because of the ridiculous black circles under my eyes. I was shakey and clammy and STILL SWEATING. So I took a deep breath and walked back to my unit and said "I really need to go home. Right now. I'm sorry." If it had been any other charge nurse, that probably would have been enough. But since I needed to explain myself I succinctly and unapologetically said "I'm shooting out of both ends. I'm shaky, I haven't stopped sweating since I got here, and I'm not going to make it. I may be able to go home and sleep and come back for my normal shift." And then I went home and proceeded to get worse. Hard to imagine, right?

There are some fantastic advantages to working in a hospital. I get free medical advice from the nurses all the time. Free blood pressure checks, great medicine resources I can use at work, and I think one of my last doctor appointments was free because he knows where I work and appreciates my unit so much. There are some disadvantages too though. When I get sick, I get SICK. And then when I'm at home and miserable, I smell like the patients that come in and it makes me feel even worse. It's not that I think I'm better than the patients that come in to the hospital, it's that I don't want to be sick like the patients that come to the hospital. Working there makes me a little paranoid too when I'm sick, wondering at what point it's the flu and what point it's internal bleeding or some other chronic issue.

But after awhile, K brought me some 7up, Vitamin Water, and Kaeopectate. I felt better, at least enough for everything to calm down and let me actually get a little sleep. And when I woke up on Saturday, I felt a gazillion times better. I took it easy yesterday and just ate some soup and crackers with some more 7up. I love Vitamin Water but I have to say my secret weapon when I'm sick with stomach issues is 7up over ice with a bendy straw, saltines, and eventually chicken and stars soup.

I collect stars because I love them. I love astronomy (the looking at stuff part, not the math and physics part) and stars just make me happy. Once I was sick at my parent's house and my mom got me chicken and stars soup because she thought it might make me feel better. I'm pretty sure I rolled my eyes when she said that but then later on I made it and sat down with a bowl of chicken and stars soup. I stuck my spoon in the bowl and all these stars were floating around and I smiled and realized my mom was right. It DID make me feel better.

I'm mostly taking it easy today as well. I'm thinking I'll go to church later on because although two Sundays in a row is an accomplishment, three almost makes it a streak.

Friday, January 25, 2008

wednesday wonders: the friday edition

This week has flown by (although strangely each shift I've worked has taken AGES to pass) and I just realized I didn't post anything. So here's a list of happy things!

...being amused by the realization that lately I seem to only be able to make friends who's names start with K or are Heather. My boyfriend is Kiris, my best friends are Kristi and Kate, I talk to Kara a lot, I started hanging out with a girl named Kristen, there's a Heather at work who's rad and then Kate's friend Heather who is awesome too! There's still fantastic people like Tina, Julie, and DeAnna of course but lately on the phone and in person, it's been K or Heather people.
...a good heartfelt conversation where K cried and I cried too. We have to figure some things out, but the love we have for each other is unlike anything else I've experienced. It's worth struggling through a few things here and there.
...having gone to church two Sundays in a row, thank you very much.
...Kara buying me dinner last night.
...renting the first two discs of season 1 of Brothers and Sisters. I really like it! My mom asked me not to watch it when it first was showing because she loved it and I'm a show killer. The guy at Blockbuster thought that was hilarious.
...getting a very nice paycheck, especially after the last one was so awful. Yay overtime!
...having a full calendar.
...school going well for me so far this term.
...good conversations about politics with my parents.
...my dad took me out to lunch last Friday which was really sweet of him and I had a great time chatting with him.
...Cloverfield. You either love it or hate it and I loved it.
...emails from my friend Splenda where she is honest and to the point but still not a bitch. It's an art form and I appreciate her thoughts so much.
...nachos. The gross processed cheese and chips kind. Yum.
...hot showers at night that mean curly hair in the morning.
...blogs.
...relevantmagazine.com -- I check out the slices at least once a day.
...finding so many apartments that are bigger AND cheaper AND closer to work on a precursory search.
...having friends I can ask TMI questions of.
...paying bills and feeling good about credit card balances
...magazines. Even though most of the content is online these days, I still love 'em. Thanks to Tina again for the surprise subscription to Glamour. :)
...sleep. Mmm, sleep.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

thank you, anonymous

I was exhausted when K left for work even though I got a decent amount of sleep. I was at work for 17 hours on Friday and didn't go straight to bed when I got home so I think that's pretty much the culprit. I do think I could work a double and then go in the next day at my regular time and be okay, but I don't think I could do two doubles in a row. Hopefully my paycheck is as sweet as I think it will be.

I showered and everything and went to Starbucks to see if K wanted me to pick him up some food. I drove through McDonald's and used my debit card to get us both lunch and then went back to Starbucks to drop off his selection. Then I drove down to the movie theater to buy tickets for us to see Cloverfield later that night. We were thinking it would sell out and we didn't want to go super late to see it but we wanted to see it yesterday for sure. It was a good strategy that worked out very nicely, just for the record. When I was standing in line, I opened up my wallet to get out my debit card and movie rewards card and realized my debit card wasn't in my wallet. I just paid with cash and went back to my truck. The debit card was nowhere to be found.

I mean nowhere to be found. I took things out of my truck, I emptied all my pockets, I went through my wallet, I checked the McDonald's bag, everything. I thought maybe it was in the parking lot at Starbucks so I drove back up there and searched the parking lot to find nothing. K came out and helped me look in my truck again. I went to McDonald's and asked inside and then looked by the drive thru windows. Nothing. I finally just gave up and drove to my parent's house about half an hour later than I had told them I would be at their place.

My parents said it wasn't that big of a deal and I just needed to call and cancel the card, and the sooner the better. I don't have much in my account and overdraft fees add up so quickly that I had awful visions of not only my money being gone but owning more just because I'm an idiot. I called and gave them my account number so they could look it up. The woman on the phone asked if I was certain no one else had used it and I said I used it at McDonald's and then lost it so that was the last transaction of mine. She said she saw that and then that fairly soon after that, someone had already called in to report the card lost. She set it up to send me a new card and said it should take about a week. And that was that!

I can't believe someone called it in lost. If I found a card, I wouldn't try to use it, but I never would have thought to call the number on the back and report it as lost. That is fantastic! I actually feel a little bad about all the cards I found at my various retail jobs that someone accidently left behind that all I did was stick it in the safe.

Everything is going to be okay.

Friday, January 18, 2008

another reason why being a girl is hard sometimes

Sometimes I think I need a good cry. It's not necessarily because something really awful happened that day but because it's been building up for awhile and it just needs to finally overflow. But everytime I need that good cry, it threatens to come at really inopportune times. Like when I'm talking about the Middle East with my dad. Or when a coworker is ripping into me about something so stupid I should be livid but am secretly envisioning running to the bathroom and sobbing until I can't anymore. Or when I'm talking to my boyfriend on the phone and I'm trying to say that my day wasn't really all that bad because it actually wasn't but I still need a good cry. But when I'm in the shower or just home by myself, no tears. So tonight the plan is to have some leftover garlic bread accompanied by a beer and then go to sleep until I wake up to work a double tomorrow.